Day off today trying to distract myself. I think its weird how I have the urge to act out but im not aroused. What's more annoying is the thought that, well if I was aroused Id have an excuse to act out.

Looking forward to going to a Christmas Market with my wife, not looking forward to the mortgage its gonna cost :)

CW: Abuse/incest

Despite being aware that fantasy around my own abuse is common.

It doesn't take away the sting when those thoughts appear, it has however stopped the feeling of confusion and disgust continuing past those initial thoughts.

Restarted my recovery recently, but feeling optimistic this time. Going to try and vent into the void (bluesky) to help instead of acting out.

Posts wont always be about that as we are not our addiction.