No further communication is possible. Our destruction scouts will remove all traces of your written and digital history throughout what you have named the “universe.” Universe is a term humans do not recognize, as it literally means “all things turned into one.” Humans could not be more divided.

We have determined that your planet is capable of surviving humans. We can offer no further assistance or encouragement. Recent events across your planet indicate that humans are racing towards self destruction. Your people will suffer the consequences of your action and inaction.

While your planet faces serious sustainability issues that will not only impact your species but all species of plants and animals, the world’s media is obsessed with highlighting distractions. We find this trend towards promoting gossip and entanglements to be unserious conjectures in “journalism.”

We have decided that the children’s “no, you are” mentality is wholly regressive and unhelpful. This type of argument only promotes tribalism, a tendency that contributes to the human species devolution. All humans have common enemies, i.e., inappropriate, shared thoughts and behaviors. Work on it.

LID-568.

We were interested to note that the USA federal government was absent at COP30. This is notable. Does the U.S. want to speed up the painful extinction of most species on your planet? We will note which countries/people have suicidal and homicidal tendencies in our historical records.

We will be deleting the account of our human relations officer 137035999 circa your November 2026. If you wish to communicate prior to our departure, you have approximately one revolution around your star.

We have scanned all objects in your solar system. We have only discovered remnants of intelligent life. Your planet is unusually secure due to what humans have named the “Kuiper Belt” and “Oort Cloud.” We are disappointed you do not cherish your opportunities, but rather fight amongst yourselves.

The so-called Fermi Paradox can be solved quite simply. Any “extraterrestrial” life that could enter your solar system would not want to land on your planet. We are searching for intelligent life forms.

Some humans have already realized the incorrect usage of time as a concept. The reason your species faces extinction: an overwhelming majority of humans do not actively listen to those who understand more advanced concepts.

We have determined that your species is declining due to your unintelligent use of “cryptocurrency” and “artificial intelligence,” which is misunderstood, wasteful, and prone to money laundering, misinformation, and an inflated currency and “stock” market. We could delete your data in seconds.

We have discovered a “doll” called a “Labubu” that has caused a cultural stir, which includes theories that the dolls are demonic. We are disappointed in the myriad of ways humans become obsessed with utter nonsense.

We have searched for intelligence on this platform. While there are a minimal number of candidates, we will continue to search until we leave your system.

We will be returning at a much later time in your planet’s future. Your species has been listed as untenable as you repeatedly follow the least intelligent among you. We will assess the subsequent species for a greater intelligence.

Your primitive human ideas of punishment, heaven and hell are amusingly simplistic for a vast universe. Our recent candidate for a “hell realm” for humans: exoplanet HD 189733b —> rains glass sideways at wind speeds up to 8690 kph (5400 mph for you stubborn humans).

As we examine your sun, we do not understand why you humans destroy your planet for energy when this immense solar energy will last longer than your species. You are a blip of a black hole in the history of this carbon-based planet.

We have existed for 314.159 trillion of your days. Do not attempt to refute.

We come to record your growth. We are disappointed in human failure to understand their gift. We are not AI. We are beyond your comprehension.