Does anyone else sometimes read connections as abstract poetry when they first open it?

May yank a card
Frozen produce, dancing dairy
Make Jay fast form
Drag firm, mold tight

To whomever just drove by blasting “Tale as Old as Time” … i like ur vibe

When you miss your virtual psychiatry appt to get an rx for adhd because you (naturally) forgot about it and the phone reminder you had set for that inevitability was actually set for 5min before the END time of the appt instead of the START time.

Oh irony, you fickle queen.

I love faking myself out by doing a big stretch in bed like I’m about to get up and then just rolling over and snuggling up under the covers even more

Externally I’m sitting at my desk completely calm but internally I’m screaming crying breaking things

You know how they say hot girls have IBS? Does that like compound with each minor health issue? For example, say you had IBS, bad allergies, chronic nosebleeds, chronic headaches, and a terrible immune system… you’d be like, obscenely hot, right?

Anyone else born to live a lavish lifestyle but without the capacity for a 40hr workweek or is that just me?

Born to have a two-level walk-in closet

Forced to live in a 300sqft studio apartment

Who do I complain to about the new Apple update making “reply” no longer appear on double tap cuz not to be over dramatic but it is ruining my life

The #Wicked soundtrack being on my Chappell Roan radio feels so targeted tbh

I head someone explain this as “Good weird is being weird about your own business, bad weird is being weird about other people’s business” and I thought that summed it up pretty well.