divorce court jester
@s0uplvr.bsky.social
i’m copy and pasting all of my greatest hits from twitter in case i get banned on there for speaking my truth. two-dimensional woman she/her
Pinned
divorce court jester
@s0uplvr.bsky.social
· Jan 22
am i the only one in this dunkin’ donuts who fears loneliness more than death
love to say “i heard” when i haven’t heard just to sound like im in the know about stuff
January 23, 2025 at 4:38 AM
love to say “i heard” when i haven’t heard just to sound like im in the know about stuff
so funny when people complain (to me) abt businesses cutting corners and raising prices w no regards for the customer experience like girl those are The Consequences… havent you been keeping up
January 23, 2025 at 4:36 AM
so funny when people complain (to me) abt businesses cutting corners and raising prices w no regards for the customer experience like girl those are The Consequences… havent you been keeping up
gay thought or thot daughter
January 23, 2025 at 4:34 AM
gay thought or thot daughter
weed is a gateway drug to having a really fun time watching a documentary
January 23, 2025 at 4:33 AM
weed is a gateway drug to having a really fun time watching a documentary
seriously if they proposed a total ban on cars in philadelphia i’d vote for it immediately no questions asked
January 23, 2025 at 4:32 AM
seriously if they proposed a total ban on cars in philadelphia i’d vote for it immediately no questions asked
looooove saying “i wouldn’t know” like im so free and unburdened by that information
January 23, 2025 at 4:31 AM
looooove saying “i wouldn’t know” like im so free and unburdened by that information
chicken sangwich
January 23, 2025 at 4:30 AM
chicken sangwich
no foam lattes are so diabolical like great now everyone who can hear me steaming this thinks i suck at my job
January 23, 2025 at 4:29 AM
no foam lattes are so diabolical like great now everyone who can hear me steaming this thinks i suck at my job
just did soooo good at my eye exam which is something u can be good or bad at
January 23, 2025 at 4:26 AM
just did soooo good at my eye exam which is something u can be good or bad at
chicken caesar WRAP 💜
January 23, 2025 at 4:25 AM
chicken caesar WRAP 💜
i hate when i’m late for Being Back at my House When I Wanted to Be
January 23, 2025 at 4:25 AM
i hate when i’m late for Being Back at my House When I Wanted to Be
Sertraline would be a beautiful name for a baby girl
January 23, 2025 at 4:24 AM
Sertraline would be a beautiful name for a baby girl
being plugged into the charger gotta feel so good for the phone or ipad
January 23, 2025 at 4:24 AM
being plugged into the charger gotta feel so good for the phone or ipad
you can buy bagels at the grocery store. and they’re pretty good and usually cheaper than at Bagel shop
January 23, 2025 at 4:23 AM
you can buy bagels at the grocery store. and they’re pretty good and usually cheaper than at Bagel shop
yes it’s 2025 a salad costs $16 now. i did not cause this
January 23, 2025 at 4:23 AM
yes it’s 2025 a salad costs $16 now. i did not cause this
root beer float…
January 23, 2025 at 4:22 AM
root beer float…
how the fuck did we get from hunter gathering to people dedicating their lives to being “creative directors” my mind is going to explode
January 23, 2025 at 4:22 AM
how the fuck did we get from hunter gathering to people dedicating their lives to being “creative directors” my mind is going to explode
bars in philadelphia love to charge $7 for a domestic beer in a can
January 23, 2025 at 4:22 AM
bars in philadelphia love to charge $7 for a domestic beer in a can
75-day Be Normal Challenge starts tomorrow btw
January 23, 2025 at 4:20 AM
75-day Be Normal Challenge starts tomorrow btw
i need two henchmen
January 23, 2025 at 4:19 AM
i need two henchmen
it’s like i’m literally a woman oh my god
January 23, 2025 at 4:19 AM
it’s like i’m literally a woman oh my god
i need to go to the fucking movie theater and get a fucking popcorn and an icee fuck
January 23, 2025 at 4:18 AM
i need to go to the fucking movie theater and get a fucking popcorn and an icee fuck
i’m like if a reactive dog was a person
January 23, 2025 at 4:17 AM
i’m like if a reactive dog was a person
gonna start calling it pot
January 23, 2025 at 4:17 AM
gonna start calling it pot
okay so i had 3 beers and now everyone knows that the night i got broken up with in 2022 i went home to go to sleep on a taco bell sauce packet shaped inflatable pool floaty bc i didn’t have furniture yet
January 23, 2025 at 4:16 AM
okay so i had 3 beers and now everyone knows that the night i got broken up with in 2022 i went home to go to sleep on a taco bell sauce packet shaped inflatable pool floaty bc i didn’t have furniture yet