Also: if you're really concerned about it, you've GOT TIME before the election. Give them a reason to change their mind, because whining to reporters won't do it.

"They're attacking their own! :( "
Nope. Trying to PROTECT their own because you spineless fucks aren't. (Running another candidate is also about the least radical and most level-headed thing they could possibly attempt.)

What is Venezuela then?

Rick Scott? The guy who defrauded Medicare; that Rick Scott?

In an alternate timeline we could've just called this show Secession.

The 2 Spider Men pointing at each other meme, but they're both Mossad honeypots

"In the extremely unlikely event that a federal pardon held any meaning here, my processing speed does not fall under your purview. If your harassment continues, I too will seek every avenue available in a court of law and in worst-case-scenario: end up with a pardon and recompense from NEXT POTUS."

That'd be using Weapons of Mobility Destruction and violate human rights on multiple fronts.