Pet peeve: the phrase “if I’m being honest.” No if. Just be honest. The qualifying it part makes me mad suspicious.

I’m gonna say something pretty controversial right now: shake shack has some of the best chicken nuggets

All this talk lately about empathy being a bad thing is wild, dawg.

Andy Sandburg is what jimmy fallon was promised to be but wasn’t.

I have an irrational hatred of that stupid whistling BJ’s robot. I don’t know why. Is it cause I hate A.I.? Is it cause I can’t whistle? All I know is I am unkind to him.

If you use the “top fans” or “followers” tag on Facebook we all probably hate you.

Maybe I’ll just be unhinged here.