“ooh 😬 blood is a natural containment and we don’t cover clean up for that 😬but we will call you at nine am to tell you we do, and then call you again five hours later to say that we don’t, actually, oops.” die one thousand deaths

what even is the point of home insurance if you can’t use it to pay for the service that cleans up, disinfects, and certifies that the home is safe after someone dies in it (and then isn’t found for two days)?

i can talk about this until im blue in the face because publishing will be publishing 😶

maybe lets the leave the "evil ccp censorship brigade" reactionary sentiment at the door when it comes to shitty people being shitty for reasons unrelated to whatever red scare mccarthyist nonsense you still believe in

its like clockwork that whenever [insert us-propagandized international enemy] does [insert literally anything] white liberals will foam at the mouth to be the first person to say something bigoted about the country/its population

this is actually the worst part about being next of kin. all the goddamn phone calls.

yes i suck cause i keep forgetting to call them back but also!! c’mon!!! if there was a possibility of a missed call for something this important why would you do it as the office is closing for days!!!!

perhaps the opossum pfp and ⚡🧙‍♂️electro wizard⚡🧙‍♂️ is not helping, but how else do you signify that you are both mysterious and funny?