Matt Leach
@ruffda.bsky.social
Falling short of my potential every day
People who live in glass houses shouldn't.
August 26, 2025 at 6:39 PM
People who live in glass houses shouldn't.
My doctor specializes in hypochondria. I get to pick my own ailments.
August 26, 2025 at 5:07 PM
My doctor specializes in hypochondria. I get to pick my own ailments.
Trump already starting tariffs on any possible alien life.
April 20, 2025 at 12:39 AM
Trump already starting tariffs on any possible alien life.
Tried shaving with Occam's razor, but the instructions were way too complicated.
April 8, 2025 at 3:35 PM
Tried shaving with Occam's razor, but the instructions were way too complicated.
Lint just isn't very smart. Falls for the same trap every time.
April 8, 2025 at 3:28 PM
Lint just isn't very smart. Falls for the same trap every time.
Dammit. ICE just grabbed my Muse.
March 29, 2025 at 1:00 PM
Dammit. ICE just grabbed my Muse.
The human nose can distinguish between one trillion scents. Hence the expression: What's that smell?
March 23, 2025 at 1:13 PM
The human nose can distinguish between one trillion scents. Hence the expression: What's that smell?
Seems like keeping THIS planet habitable should be a higher priority than colonizing an uninhabitable one.
February 12, 2025 at 5:14 PM
Seems like keeping THIS planet habitable should be a higher priority than colonizing an uninhabitable one.
Has anyone seen my Organizer?
February 12, 2025 at 11:37 AM
Has anyone seen my Organizer?
Poor Pysagoras. He was sure his new serum would finally bring him the respect he so desperately sought.
February 10, 2025 at 3:16 PM
Poor Pysagoras. He was sure his new serum would finally bring him the respect he so desperately sought.
Would have named the last kid Hyperbole except that would have been the dumbest name ever.
February 9, 2025 at 11:51 AM
Would have named the last kid Hyperbole except that would have been the dumbest name ever.
Stuff him up Lincoln's nose.
January 30, 2025 at 9:12 PM
Stuff him up Lincoln's nose.
I think, therefore I yam. -- semi-literate, above-average pumpkin
January 9, 2025 at 1:30 PM
I think, therefore I yam. -- semi-literate, above-average pumpkin
I may have cut my finger on the ketchup bottle cap, but I can't tell.
December 30, 2024 at 11:35 AM
I may have cut my finger on the ketchup bottle cap, but I can't tell.
I'm going to stick with strutting. I’m going to need more time if I’m also supposed to fret.
December 9, 2024 at 1:42 PM
I'm going to stick with strutting. I’m going to need more time if I’m also supposed to fret.
Eww. Disney on ice again!? What sort of ghouls are we??
December 8, 2024 at 12:47 PM
Eww. Disney on ice again!? What sort of ghouls are we??
Went into a crowded fire station and shouted "Movie!" They didn't get it.
December 5, 2024 at 2:00 PM
Went into a crowded fire station and shouted "Movie!" They didn't get it.
Cynical Hour today from 4-6pm. All drinks 2 for 1 as long as you stop clapping for Tinkerbell.
November 29, 2024 at 2:15 PM
Cynical Hour today from 4-6pm. All drinks 2 for 1 as long as you stop clapping for Tinkerbell.
As we prepare to celebrate our victory in the Great Pilgrim Uprising of 16whateveritwas, let us give thanks we never again had to wear those stupid hats.
November 26, 2024 at 8:21 PM
As we prepare to celebrate our victory in the Great Pilgrim Uprising of 16whateveritwas, let us give thanks we never again had to wear those stupid hats.
Everyone resents my omnipotence.
November 26, 2024 at 1:37 PM
Everyone resents my omnipotence.
I have always depended on the strangeness of kindergartners.
November 25, 2024 at 12:18 PM
I have always depended on the strangeness of kindergartners.
Whose bright idea was it to turn the gravity up?
November 22, 2024 at 6:49 PM
Whose bright idea was it to turn the gravity up?
From now on, I'm measuring everything in cubits. Try to stop me! (But please note the restraining order has established a 35 cubit distance you must maintain.)
November 20, 2024 at 3:51 PM
From now on, I'm measuring everything in cubits. Try to stop me! (But please note the restraining order has established a 35 cubit distance you must maintain.)
It's my way or the highway!
Unless you really insist on your way, in which case I'm sure we can make some sort of accommodation, probably one that resembles your way in most, if not all, respects -- if that's OK with you.
Unless you really insist on your way, in which case I'm sure we can make some sort of accommodation, probably one that resembles your way in most, if not all, respects -- if that's OK with you.
November 19, 2024 at 7:56 PM
It's my way or the highway!
Unless you really insist on your way, in which case I'm sure we can make some sort of accommodation, probably one that resembles your way in most, if not all, respects -- if that's OK with you.
Unless you really insist on your way, in which case I'm sure we can make some sort of accommodation, probably one that resembles your way in most, if not all, respects -- if that's OK with you.