No, I don't think my life will turn around and get better. Guess my life was never meant to be good. Well, I guess I also deserve this. I am a piece of shit. Human trash. Maybe I should just end myself for real. I'm too tired.

Quitting those meds was a mistake, lol. I guess feeling nothing, having stomach issues, and sweating like a pig is better than what is going on atm.

Being some stupid tool with no value, because I am not what society or majority of people wants me to be.

I really hate humanity. We shouldn't exist.

To go out there and sweat my ass off in front of randos?? You want me to suffer and feel uncomfortable 24/7 until I finally snap????

Pay my debts and provide me financially so I can quit my shitty job. Maybe then I might actually do something for my looks and whatever.

I have feelings, personality, values and beliefs.

When will you start seeing people as actual humans that are so much more than their looks? Also, as individuals?

Yes, I'm lazy to work out. But every day I struggle with million other problems. You think I have the fcking energy...

I am so goddamn tired constantly having to work or do shit just to please the society or whatever 🤷‍♀️ Jfc... Every passing day i feel more and more dead inside... You really think I wanna work more?? Just to look pretty and then be accepted as a person??

People who says "you can do this and that if you just put more effort" are annoying. Of course anyone with a support system can do everything. Unfortunately not all people has that you fuck face.

Getting hit by a truck would probably be great and best option for me. But also at the same time I don't _actually_ wanna die. You know, family reasons and I'm actually a wuss. The only good things in life are animals, coffee, good food, art, and music.

I wonder what kind of an asshole I was in my past life to now experience all this.

So yeah, I'm just living without any passion or dreams... Doing whatever society, my parents, and the workplace expects me to do.

Why does a useless person like me even exist? No skills, bad finances, fat and unattractive, unlucky, and boring. Oh boy.

Even now, I have no passion or interest for anything. Maybe I am dead inside. I just do things if I really have to. I studied because I have to work and get money so I can live... All that, even though I never wished to be born.