Thank you for coming to my deck tech for my chud son
It is my child
Please ask me questions
I hope someone builds it better
I hope you play it and agree that it sucks good

If this deck had a way to equip things faster I think it would be pushing tier 2 genuinely

I hate the Buster Sword
But it’s not legendary
I love Aetherspark
but it is legendary
Tutor Priority is often Aetherspark>>Protection >>Evasion>>Buster Sword
I’m playing with Dragoons lance in the sideboard
You don’t need that many lands
You definitely don’t need more than 2 blue sources ever

It feels really weird because
Vs slow match ups if you get ahead Ward makes it so they can’t efficiently play shit on your turn and you don’t have to commit into board wipes ever
Vs anything aggro that’s not Screaming Nemesis you can often lifelink your way out of anything that doesn’t kill

If I had to give a reason why it works
It’s because the blue white removal package is stupidly efficient for its cost
And the deck has incredible redundancy actually
Being able to make the cats and zack threats that need addressing is a really weird board state that happens and I love it?

That list also sucked
But it was an insanely funny machine to progressively build in a game

When foundations dropped I played a B/W deck called the aristocats that was centered around looping nine lives familiar with arahbo to generate a wall of cats that could either A beat down or B Mill you at instant speed using Bartolome and Scavengers Talent

I am fully convinced it wins because each individual piece sucks just enough to make people ask
“Do I need to blow this up?”
And somehow more often than not they’re just wrong??

Someone asked in our discord how to play Hope aggro and posted a rough draft list and asked for suggestions late one night
I attempted to fix that list as a thought experiment because it lived rent free in my brain the moment I saw it at 6 am the next morning

The name is a reference to one of the names my girlfriend goes by
This is in fact the most ridiculous do it for her moment I have pulled off

Uma_Player

what a woman 🤤