And that summer was the first time
I felt the touch so hot yet stone cold
So much of what I do is because of it all
But still walk down the same pitfall

That morning's crisp sun piercing my eyes
The air, cold and heavy like a body of water
The chirps outside and faint whispers
The stench of sorrow I can't get rid of

So if it's not real, then I don't need these anymore
I gouge out my eyes and feel the pain of everyone before
And I tear out a page, let it float down the river
Maybe downstream it finds a new caregiver

Masterpiece, a black bird splitting the night sky
One time I caught a glimpse through the thick mist
I run, I hold my hand out and grip
But I find nothing when I open my fist

With all my might I scratch and claw at the rugged walls
I scream, I shout, I bark, but the brick does not respond
To chip away the mortar, it will take a decade
By that time, the house, it will be vacant

cold steel sinks so deep into the tissue of my being
unbearable hurt or letting it bleed out completely
the wretched wounds will one day defeat me
ever growing feeling that removal will be freeing