Tim Woodruff - ServiceNow Nerd
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Tim Woodruff - ServiceNow Nerd
@professortim.bsky.social
Sr. Director, Cloud Engineering
Author, The ServiceNow Development Handbook (https://handbook.snc.guru) et. al. & SN Pro Tips (https://snprotips.com).
Pinned
Did you know that you can buy the #ServiceNow Development Handbook 3rd edition on audiobook?

You shouldn't... but you could! ...If you want a computer voice attempt to read code out loud.

https://a.co/d/41IWKOt
1/2
Ayo listen... do y'all use Microsoft #PowerToys Command Palette?
What sort of Command Palette Extensions would you like to see for it?
October 18, 2025 at 3:39 PM
I don't know about y'all, but I get all my financial advice by going on TikTok and searching for the hashtag "#NotFinancialAdvice".
October 11, 2025 at 11:46 PM
Currently resisting the urge to get "BULLSHIT" tattooed on my hand so that when some #Portland hippy starts spouting pseudoscience, I can ask them if they'll "read my palm".
September 21, 2025 at 3:32 PM
Getting really tired of my massively expensive health care company sending me ads for already-free apps in place of actual mental or physical healthcare.

No, I don't want to meditate with the "Calm" app or talk to an #AI therapist to help me get over the death of a loved one.
September 12, 2025 at 3:42 PM
People with lathes must have SO MANY VASES.
August 31, 2025 at 2:47 AM
Wish me luck, y'all.
July 30, 2025 at 4:34 PM
Where my #DnD nerds at?

handbook.snc.guru
July 30, 2025 at 4:14 AM
Two coffees:
$31.10
(plus tax, tip, and fees)

Two coffees and two egg bites, incl. taxes, fees, and tip:
$67.74 ಠ_ಠ
July 25, 2025 at 7:57 PM
That shitty parchment paper stuff on the bench table thing on doctors offices... WTF is that shit for? Who is that helping?
July 22, 2025 at 9:31 PM
I am not comfortable ringing one of those "ring for service" bells, and I'm fairly certain that I literally never will be.
July 21, 2025 at 6:06 PM
Extra relevance from 5 months ago.

Hope you had fun on "pleasure Island", Donald.
July 21, 2025 at 6:11 AM
Does anyone else judge people who refer to multiplication by saying "times it by" instead of "multiply it by"?

To me, saying "times it by three" is like saying "plus it by three" instead of "add three" - which, I hope we can all agree, would be absurd.
July 19, 2025 at 3:46 PM
So... if I don't go big... I can go home?
July 7, 2025 at 6:53 AM
As of today, my context window is now 38 years. 🎂
July 5, 2025 at 2:47 AM
Got my Framework 13. Loving it so far. ❤️
June 30, 2025 at 1:03 PM
I think my #dog is broken. ಠ⁠ᴥ⁠ಠ

@weratedogs.com
June 24, 2025 at 3:39 AM
Reposted by Tim Woodruff - ServiceNow Nerd
The sigil was drawn in salt and ash, the candles lit at the pentagram points, the incantation declaimed.

There was a shimmer - a demon appeared.

"Curious. What ritual is this?"

"I got it from ChatGPT. I included all protections in my prompt!"

"I see," the demon said and stepped out of the sigil.
May 22, 2025 at 8:20 PM
ServiceNow #K25 day 2.5.
May 7, 2025 at 9:25 PM
😎🫡
May 5, 2025 at 3:11 PM
Did you know that you can buy the #ServiceNow Development Handbook 3rd edition on audiobook?

You shouldn't... but you could! ...If you want a computer voice attempt to read code out loud.

https://a.co/d/41IWKOt
1/2
May 5, 2025 at 1:05 PM
#TIL that if I become mayor of a town, I'm allowed to just set the time zone to whatever the hell I want.

I need to become mayor.
I NEED to have a time zone that constantly flips like GMT+10 and GMT-63.5, and then it's GMT-8:03:11:40, then on Thursdays it's GMT+2π.
May 5, 2025 at 1:32 AM
Can anyone explain to me why my dryer has a "whites" setting?
Or what the heck the difference is between "normal" and "regular"?
May 5, 2025 at 12:54 AM
Correction - this is so fucking hilarious that I'm now selling the handbook third edition on audible.

It's like four bucks, and the Kindle edition addon is only two more.
So the Kindle version is $6 instead of $10 if you're enough of a madlad to buy the audiobook version.

handbook.snc.guru
April 1, 2025 at 2:13 AM
ABSOLUTELY. THE. FUCK. NOT.
You will NEVER catch me selling any of my books in audiobook format with an AI generated voice.

#AI #Slop @edzitron
March 25, 2025 at 9:51 PM
People are really getting buy-now-pay-later loans for their door dash orders?

Who thinks we should start putting together tranches of CDOs on subprime #BNPL loans?
March 24, 2025 at 11:14 PM