Superimportantsuccessprof
@profbelindab.bsky.social
Camford prof sharing insights on becoming a fearless leader and academic star. Very special advisor and multiple founder. 110% not a parody account. Look at all the letters after my name!
What is so beautiful about our anti-bullying policies? They don't work for the victims. Everyone knows the professor always wins against staff or students. Bingo! You can *micromanage* people out of their jobs and they won't file a complaint. Your win: no complaints = nothing happened.
June 11, 2025 at 8:01 AM
What is so beautiful about our anti-bullying policies? They don't work for the victims. Everyone knows the professor always wins against staff or students. Bingo! You can *micromanage* people out of their jobs and they won't file a complaint. Your win: no complaints = nothing happened.
How to gain sympathy? Grab every free brownie point. Always volunteer your help in public. You hardly ever have to follow through and you can get out of anything backstage. Bingo! People remember your stage performance, they don't see how you behalve behind the scenes.
May 29, 2025 at 9:35 AM
How to gain sympathy? Grab every free brownie point. Always volunteer your help in public. You hardly ever have to follow through and you can get out of anything backstage. Bingo! People remember your stage performance, they don't see how you behalve behind the scenes.
What so many research centers get wrong is that they don't mention who their Director is in every single post or press release. What a missed opportunity! Make your name shine all the time!
May 22, 2025 at 1:08 PM
What so many research centers get wrong is that they don't mention who their Director is in every single post or press release. What a missed opportunity! Make your name shine all the time!
What if the hiring panel doesn't agree with you? This is why you should chair and not have HR minute it. Simply change the decision afterwards. Bingo! The trusting fools aren't going to check. If the panel finds out, just blame it all on a misunderstanding. Be bold and no-one dares to call you out!
May 22, 2025 at 8:03 AM
What if the hiring panel doesn't agree with you? This is why you should chair and not have HR minute it. Simply change the decision afterwards. Bingo! The trusting fools aren't going to check. If the panel finds out, just blame it all on a misunderstanding. Be bold and no-one dares to call you out!
Hire the people you want, not the people the hiring panel wants. How? Carefully brief your favorite. Tell them what to say. You can even text or chat during the interview to help them. Bingo! They'll give perfect answers. Keep HR people and their stupid rules out of it as much as you can.
May 22, 2025 at 7:47 AM
Hire the people you want, not the people the hiring panel wants. How? Carefully brief your favorite. Tell them what to say. You can even text or chat during the interview to help them. Bingo! They'll give perfect answers. Keep HR people and their stupid rules out of it as much as you can.
Take my word for it: most of these 'complaints' come from whining mediocre middle-aged men who can't stand superwomen and from snowflake 'professional' staff--women, mostly, who are just too slow and get in your way. Always praise these ladies in public. Turn on the heat when no-one is watching.
Cambridge University accused of bullying ‘cover-up’ as internal survey revealed
Cambridge University accused of bullying ‘cover-up’ as internal survey revealed
Only a quarter of staff are satisfied with how their department tackles bullying and harassment, FoI requests reveal
Only a quarter of staff at Cambridge University are satisfied with how their department tackles bullying and harassment, according to an internal survey seen by the Observer.
Cambridge undertook its staff culture survey in January 2024 and is now facing accusations from academics that it tried to cover up the “grim” results, which have been released through freedom of information (FoI) requests. Continue reading...
www.theguardian.com
May 22, 2025 at 7:20 AM
Take my word for it: most of these 'complaints' come from whining mediocre middle-aged men who can't stand superwomen and from snowflake 'professional' staff--women, mostly, who are just too slow and get in your way. Always praise these ladies in public. Turn on the heat when no-one is watching.
How to get the maximum out of a budget you don't control? Never ask for all you want at first. Get the budget owner to agree your participation in principle. Pretend you are not there for the money. Bingo! Wait a bit and then present the bill. Ask to see just a finger, then grab the whole arm.
May 21, 2025 at 4:37 PM
How to get the maximum out of a budget you don't control? Never ask for all you want at first. Get the budget owner to agree your participation in principle. Pretend you are not there for the money. Bingo! Wait a bit and then present the bill. Ask to see just a finger, then grab the whole arm.
How to make your research group look bigger? Claim anyone vaguely associated with it as yours and suggest you employ them. Just stick you label on them. People are too polite to object. Bingo! Boldly print inflated numbers on merchandise and in your annual report. Who is going to check it anyway?!
May 9, 2025 at 1:26 PM
How to make your research group look bigger? Claim anyone vaguely associated with it as yours and suggest you employ them. Just stick you label on them. People are too polite to object. Bingo! Boldly print inflated numbers on merchandise and in your annual report. Who is going to check it anyway?!
Is teaching getting in the way of your success? This is what PhD students and postdocs are for. Farm it out to them. Bingo! You can still claim the credit and blame them if anything goes wrong. Double bingo!
May 9, 2025 at 1:07 PM
Is teaching getting in the way of your success? This is what PhD students and postdocs are for. Farm it out to them. Bingo! You can still claim the credit and blame them if anything goes wrong. Double bingo!
Need more oomph in your presentation? Don't waste time on a carefully crafted argument. Brag about grant income, name big journals, big up citations, name drop. Show abstracts and figures in a hurry and promise explanations in the Q&A for which you don't leave time. Bingo! Audience overwhelmed.
May 8, 2025 at 10:54 AM
Need more oomph in your presentation? Don't waste time on a carefully crafted argument. Brag about grant income, name big journals, big up citations, name drop. Show abstracts and figures in a hurry and promise explanations in the Q&A for which you don't leave time. Bingo! Audience overwhelmed.
Is it difficult to disrupt and realign a field? Not when you do it like I do it. Disrupt your minions' wellbeing and confidence. Cross the line of collegial norms whenever you can, of course only sideways and downwards. Bingo! Disrupted and realigned.
May 8, 2025 at 10:41 AM
Is it difficult to disrupt and realign a field? Not when you do it like I do it. Disrupt your minions' wellbeing and confidence. Cross the line of collegial norms whenever you can, of course only sideways and downwards. Bingo! Disrupted and realigned.
Is revenge sweet? Is it productive? Oh yes, it is. Set examples and make clear that you enjoy revenge. This will keep your minions on their toes. And they'll think twice before filing a complaint against you. Bingo! Keep it light tough. Smile and laugh when you talk about revenge.
February 25, 2025 at 12:00 PM
Is revenge sweet? Is it productive? Oh yes, it is. Set examples and make clear that you enjoy revenge. This will keep your minions on their toes. And they'll think twice before filing a complaint against you. Bingo! Keep it light tough. Smile and laugh when you talk about revenge.
Is it better to ask permission or to say sorry? Neither! You have to innovate, disrupt, and lead! You're too big and bold for petty bureaucratic nonsense. Don't they see the money and the letters after your name? Bingo! Never apologise. Just do. There’s always someone you can throw under the bus.
February 22, 2025 at 3:10 PM
Is it better to ask permission or to say sorry? Neither! You have to innovate, disrupt, and lead! You're too big and bold for petty bureaucratic nonsense. Don't they see the money and the letters after your name? Bingo! Never apologise. Just do. There’s always someone you can throw under the bus.
How to inflate your grant portfolio? Always use the biggest numbers. Use totals for networks and consortiums, not your share. Stick a fantasy number on in-kind contributions, double count matched funding, claim all credit. Noone ever checks. Bingo! The bigger the number, the more people admire you.
February 22, 2025 at 2:55 PM
How to inflate your grant portfolio? Always use the biggest numbers. Use totals for networks and consortiums, not your share. Stick a fantasy number on in-kind contributions, double count matched funding, claim all credit. Noone ever checks. Bingo! The bigger the number, the more people admire you.
Need to bully someone in a meeting but don't want witnesses? Easy. "Let's take this offline." Make some nice but vague promises. Everyone happyy to move on with the meeting. Bingo! Don't forget to forget your promises when you have them 1-on-1 in a corner.
February 22, 2025 at 2:43 PM
Need to bully someone in a meeting but don't want witnesses? Easy. "Let's take this offline." Make some nice but vague promises. Everyone happyy to move on with the meeting. Bingo! Don't forget to forget your promises when you have them 1-on-1 in a corner.
Don't want to share information? Simply say: "you're so busy, I don't want to burden you with this, you don't have to read this / join this meeting." Pretend to be thoughtful while keeping your cards close to your chest. Bingo! Cover your manipulations with sympathy. People fall for it all the time.
February 22, 2025 at 2:36 PM
Don't want to share information? Simply say: "you're so busy, I don't want to burden you with this, you don't have to read this / join this meeting." Pretend to be thoughtful while keeping your cards close to your chest. Bingo! Cover your manipulations with sympathy. People fall for it all the time.
Need to beef up your cv for a grant application? Go on, list that R&R as forthcoming. Chances are it will be forthcoming and if anyone asks awkward questions, you can always blame a postsoc. Bingo! Fake it to make it.
February 22, 2025 at 2:22 PM
Need to beef up your cv for a grant application? Go on, list that R&R as forthcoming. Chances are it will be forthcoming and if anyone asks awkward questions, you can always blame a postsoc. Bingo! Fake it to make it.
Not happy with your title? Just change it! Ignore those pesky committees, panels, or statutes. Don't ask. To hell with your Dean or whoever thinks they can control how you identify. Journalists will print any professorship you give them. Bingo! You are worth the title you fancy - well, I am, anyway.
February 21, 2025 at 4:16 PM
Not happy with your title? Just change it! Ignore those pesky committees, panels, or statutes. Don't ask. To hell with your Dean or whoever thinks they can control how you identify. Journalists will print any professorship you give them. Bingo! You are worth the title you fancy - well, I am, anyway.
Need a signature from someone? Don't give managers or administrators time to think, consult, check, or ask you difficult questions. Tell them you need it now! Pretend your request is urgent or wait till just before a deadline. Bingo! Get what you want and avoid scrutiny.
February 21, 2025 at 3:57 PM
Need a signature from someone? Don't give managers or administrators time to think, consult, check, or ask you difficult questions. Tell them you need it now! Pretend your request is urgent or wait till just before a deadline. Bingo! Get what you want and avoid scrutiny.
Random tip: you're a webinar panel member and afraid you won't get enough attention. (t)ask your postdocs to join and ask you questions? Too transparent. Do you have a teenager who has your partner's surname? Bingo! Get them to pretend they don't know you and ask you a question. Worked a treat!
February 19, 2025 at 3:29 PM
Random tip: you're a webinar panel member and afraid you won't get enough attention. (t)ask your postdocs to join and ask you questions? Too transparent. Do you have a teenager who has your partner's surname? Bingo! Get them to pretend they don't know you and ask you a question. Worked a treat!