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Beth H

@pineappledalek.bsky.social

They/them. Queer: Ace, Aro, gender unconfirmed
Christian: Methodist, progressive, deconstruction
Music talents: Mezzo Soprano, basic guitar, novice uke
Fan of: Psych, Quantum Leap, Star Trek, Doctor Who, P!nk, Semler

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Beth H

@pineappledalek.bsky.social

Anyways, here's a grief poem I finished today & posted on FB:

Screenshot of white text on a black background which reads:

Is it really better to have loved and lost?
Because the losing hurts so much
And the grief can last for weeks,
Months,
Years
And life will not stop long enough
To let you mourn and just be

No matter how much you try to prepare yourself
Letting go is never easy
Or simple
Or a straight line
Moving on can feel like a betrayal
By showing how you don't need them in your life

Others will try to help you through it
Saying they've experienced similar lost
And grief
And emotions
But it's always different and unique
Even among family members

Screenshot of white text on a black background which reads:

One day the pain will lessen
You might not cry for days,
Weeks,
Months at a time
But then something will remind you
And the tears will just flow

Some say grief is love with nowhere to go
But that doesn't feel right
Or so simple
Or universal
It is so much more complicated than that
And often indescribable and all encompassing

Grief is a mix of love and pain so strong it disables you
It disrupts your life in ways noticeable
Inconvient
Or Subconsciously
It makes moving on sometimes seem impossible
And you feel caught in a never ending spiral

Screenshot of white text on a black background which reads:

The grief can bring up other emotions
Ones you didn't realize you had
Such as guilt
Regret
Resentment
The negativity can outweigh the positive
Making the future seem bleak and unmanageable

One day the good memories will soften the sad
Tears will be outnumbered
By laughter
Smiles
Good times
But the heartache won't completely leave
So you learn to live with it

Maybe the grief will have broken you
With wounds being reopened by anniversaries
Holidays
Everyday life
And the scars will remain
To keep you down for a long time

Screenshot of white text on a black background which reads:

Honoring the dead might only help the living
And there is no expiration date
On grief
And love
"You don't know what you have until it's gone"
So remembering can help heal the soul

So maybe it is better to have loved and lost
To help appreciate the little things
With wonder
And awe
To open yourself up to more love and pain
And make life feel precious and worth living

June 28, 2025 at 11:51 PM

Beth H

@pineappledalek.bsky.social

Hit 20k steps today & don't feel as tired as I thought I would, esp since most days I barely get 5k

June 8, 2025 at 2:27 AM

Beth H

@pineappledalek.bsky.social

Nothing like being almost unrecognizable in a mask, sun glasses, and a hat when photos are taken, besides the fact that I am usually masking & often have a hat on (took the hat off to perform)

June 8, 2025 at 12:13 AM

Beth H

@pineappledalek.bsky.social

I've been avoiding changing the light bulbs in my room due to dead bugs, but I might have to suck it up & actually change them since the bulb was just flashing for a minute before going out with a slight pop...

or I can switch to lamps....

Picture of a ceiling light fixture with only a section of it lit up

June 6, 2025 at 5:05 PM

Beth H

@pineappledalek.bsky.social

My fitness tracking app was very confused during my after-work walk by the lakefront. It thinks I walked 4.73 miles in 66 minutes instead of a little over 3 miles

Map of downtown with a tracked workout. Instead of steady lines, the lines jump all over the place

Map of downtown with a tracked workout using mostly straight lines of the streets and sidewalks

May 12, 2025 at 10:56 PM

Beth H

@pineappledalek.bsky.social

I hung out with my Aunt and Uncle this afternoon and we had a nice chill day; if you ignored their dog who kept barking in my face and would not calm down for more than a minute unless one of us left the room....

Light Tan dog looking at the camera while laying on an ottoman, TV and wood walls in the background

May 12, 2025 at 2:34 AM

Beth H

@pineappledalek.bsky.social

Goodbye Duolingo

I refuse to support AI over real people

(even if it takes me awhile to actually act)

Dark blue background, green Duolingo owl looking sad. Text reads Your account will be deleted on 2025-05-13

May 6, 2025 at 7:34 PM

Beth H

@pineappledalek.bsky.social

Me: *wearing my quantum leap shirt to church dinner, always hoping someone asks me my favorite question*

Church person: So were you even alive during the original run of the show?

Me: *trying not to cackle with glee* Yes, I was born 2 months before it premiered XD

Picture taken in a bar restroom mirror. Mirror has a black frame and walls are orange-ish. White person wearing a baseball hat, blue facemask, unbuttoned green shirt over a dark blue graphic tee that has the photo of two men and the words Quantum Leap

April 25, 2025 at 3:25 AM

Beth H

@pineappledalek.bsky.social

#TAMW you're on the bus and overhear the people near you complaining about how "gay people stole God's rainbow" (among other things) while you're currently wearing a rainbow plaid scarf....

White person sitting in a car wearing a hat in camouflage colors with the words Sumler Staff in orange, dark wire glasses, navy blue mask, rainbow plaid scarf, plaid dress shirt, and black rain jacket. Hair is barely visible under the hat due to undercut/buzz cut

April 22, 2025 at 10:48 PM

Beth H

@pineappledalek.bsky.social

Palm Sunday means making crosses during church services. I think I made over 35 today within 2.5 hours

A couple of Palm leaves next to a cross made out of a Palm leaf, all laying on a black background

April 13, 2025 at 7:03 PM

Beth H

@pineappledalek.bsky.social

Happy #NationalPetDay to both tabby cats in my house:

Charlie the grey tabby, aka my little stalker

Minnie the brown tabby, aka my sister's cat

Gray tabby cat sitting in a kitchen and staring at the camera

Brown tabby cat sitting in a cat tree in front of a window

Zoomed in photo of a Grey tabby cat sitting in front of a brown tabby cat with a small Christmas tree behind them

April 11, 2025 at 4:19 PM

Beth H

@pineappledalek.bsky.social

As both a P!nk fan and Ace/Aro person, I'm very tempted to get shirt...TBD, it is $40 plus shipping/taxes

Pink background with white text that reads "A message from P!nk: To celebrate the 25th anniversary of my debut album, Can't Take Me Home, we're offering an exclusive tee just for Spotify fans! A limited quantity is available for this offer - until April 14, 2025 at 1:00 PM EDT or while supplies last - so act quickly!"
Below text is a "Buy now" button, then a black shirt with Pink's face and the words "P!nk can't take me home"

April 4, 2025 at 5:51 PM

Beth H

@pineappledalek.bsky.social

At work, I had to add up hours worked by week so did each of the 3 weeks in a different color to make it easier.

I realized about 20mins in that I accidentally picked colors in the trans flag, lol

Screenshot of an Excel sheet that has labor grouped by name and in order of date, every few lines are highlighted in a different color of the trans flag

April 3, 2025 at 3:33 PM

Beth H

@pineappledalek.bsky.social

One thing you may not know about me is that I enjoy reading & writing fanfiction. I wrote a fair amount in my 20's, but then life got busy & complicated. In 2024 I decided to reprioritize it.

This week I posted the final chapter of a story I started a decade ago and I just got the sweetest comment:

March 22, 2025 at 4:02 PM

Beth H

@pineappledalek.bsky.social

I had texted one of the leaders as this discussion was happening (they were home sick) and they said that they would address it with the group the next week. I think what they presented was a pretty good response (I wish they had asked me to review it first)

Summary of how the United Methodist's official position on queer people/homosexuality has changed recently, and how individual members/churches still have a ways to go in implementing those changes

March 4, 2025 at 1:30 PM

Beth H

@pineappledalek.bsky.social

Decided to a "Rainbow table" during service & it turned out okay

Colored pencil drawing of a progress flag coming down from the sun, draping across a communion table, and continuing into the floor, also with clouds and simple birds in the background

February 23, 2025 at 3:49 PM

Beth H

@pineappledalek.bsky.social

I've been wanting to start a group for LGBTQIA+ Christians for years & it's finally happening! It's in the church weekly newsletter & bulletin!

AHHH! So much pressure! So much anxiety! I hope it grows but also don't want it to get too big....

Heart with colors of the progressive flag over text: New LGBTQIA+ Support Group. Church member Beth H is forming a regular gathering and support group for LGBTQIA+ adults and active allies. The goal is for the meeting to be held once a month on Sundays from 12:30-2:00PM in Room 161. The first gathering will take place on February 16 and be dedicated to discussing goals and intentions, followed by a short meditative prayer service. The second meeting is scheduled for March 2. If anyone is interested in being involved in this ministry in any way, please contact Beth

February 7, 2025 at 7:00 PM

Beth H

@pineappledalek.bsky.social

Really grateful to friends who said yes to coming to my small church & learning a 6-part song in less than a week!

The whole song can be viewed starting at 15:01 on YouTube youtu.be/-GkxzCWd7gM

(Reposting b/c the sound was wonky the first time but it probably still is)

January 21, 2025 at 1:04 AM

Beth H

@pineappledalek.bsky.social

12° when I left the house & 7° at 9am. I hope I have enough layers when it's time to wait for the bus home from work

January 20, 2025 at 2:15 PM

Beth H

@pineappledalek.bsky.social

Today it's almost 60*F & mostly dry, which means it's a good day for a bike ride. Don't think I'll get many other chances before spring

December 28, 2024 at 6:30 PM

Beth H

@pineappledalek.bsky.social

Nativity scene that I crocheted in 2022. I had originally planned to expand on it, but it hasn't happened yet. Maybe next year I can add at least one more figure....