“Would be funny if it weren’t so sad.”
— GLaDOS, Portal 2
— GLaDOS, Portal 2
August 14, 2025 at 2:33 AM
“Would be funny if it weren’t so sad.”
— GLaDOS, Portal 2
— GLaDOS, Portal 2
Taxis and hotels are cheaper and better than Ubers and Air BnBs, but some of y’all not ready to talk about that.
August 9, 2025 at 1:32 AM
Taxis and hotels are cheaper and better than Ubers and Air BnBs, but some of y’all not ready to talk about that.
Just in case you want a window into Greek Orthodox esoterica, an Athonite monk just roasted me via text from Athos with a Ben Affleck/J-Lo break up reference.
June 24, 2025 at 12:06 AM
Just in case you want a window into Greek Orthodox esoterica, an Athonite monk just roasted me via text from Athos with a Ben Affleck/J-Lo break up reference.
Teaching undergrads keeps me young. I even listen to their music, now. My Spotify is 100% Shaboobey and Duo Pupo.
May 26, 2025 at 1:42 PM
Teaching undergrads keeps me young. I even listen to their music, now. My Spotify is 100% Shaboobey and Duo Pupo.
Rain shower heads ain’t shit. I don’t need four thousand gentle trickle streams falling directly on my head. I need a hydro jet to baja blast me clean at every angle.
May 22, 2025 at 4:39 PM
Rain shower heads ain’t shit. I don’t need four thousand gentle trickle streams falling directly on my head. I need a hydro jet to baja blast me clean at every angle.
Not heal soul?
Then why heal soul shaped?
Then why heal soul shaped?
April 21, 2025 at 3:44 PM
Not heal soul?
Then why heal soul shaped?
Then why heal soul shaped?
90 years ago people were actually out here naming people “Wink” and “Tip” and “Smylie” just manufacturing problems.
Breaking News: Wink Martindale, the dapper and affable host of game shows like “Gambit,” “Tic-Tac-Dough” and “Debt,” has died at 91.
Wink Martindale, Popular and Durable Game Show Host, Dies at 91
He was involved in more than 20 game shows, most memorably as the host of “Gambit” and “Tic-Tac-Dough” in the 1970s and ’80s.
www.nytimes.com
April 16, 2025 at 3:17 AM
90 years ago people were actually out here naming people “Wink” and “Tip” and “Smylie” just manufacturing problems.
Close your eyes. I want you to imagine a pro hockey player. Have you got it? Now open your eyes. Was this your card?
Breaking News from @theathletic.bsky.social: The Capitals star Alex Ovechkin broke Wayne Gretzky’s record for NHL career goals, scoring No. 895 against the Islanders. www.nytimes.com/athletic/625...
April 7, 2025 at 1:15 PM
Close your eyes. I want you to imagine a pro hockey player. Have you got it? Now open your eyes. Was this your card?
Ok. I’m going to need a LOT more Augusta/Masters content out of you all for the next 8 days. I know you can do it. Hands in!
April 6, 2025 at 11:00 PM
Ok. I’m going to need a LOT more Augusta/Masters content out of you all for the next 8 days. I know you can do it. Hands in!
One great thing about living in such proximity to a university is finding gems like this when I go to take out the recycling.
March 23, 2025 at 6:50 PM
One great thing about living in such proximity to a university is finding gems like this when I go to take out the recycling.
When it’s time for us to have our next child, the first question I’m asking the nurse after it’s born is “Has it verve?”
March 23, 2025 at 3:04 AM
When it’s time for us to have our next child, the first question I’m asking the nurse after it’s born is “Has it verve?”
Maybe Severance isn’t an absurdist take on work/life balance. Maybe it’s a metaphor for growing up in Utah.
March 23, 2025 at 2:54 AM
Maybe Severance isn’t an absurdist take on work/life balance. Maybe it’s a metaphor for growing up in Utah.
My small child: I just want to eat the bread of the hotdog…not the dog.
March 16, 2025 at 12:07 PM
My small child: I just want to eat the bread of the hotdog…not the dog.
Sometimes you send a chapter draft off, walk away from your email for a whole weekend, and just wait for the unhinged screed in your inbox Monday morning.
February 22, 2025 at 12:05 AM
Sometimes you send a chapter draft off, walk away from your email for a whole weekend, and just wait for the unhinged screed in your inbox Monday morning.
My son in his directorial debut. I’m seeing shades of early Jean-Luc Godard.
February 13, 2025 at 4:35 PM
My son in his directorial debut. I’m seeing shades of early Jean-Luc Godard.
JD Vance? Of Vance Refrigeration?
February 13, 2025 at 12:29 AM
JD Vance? Of Vance Refrigeration?
The logic of football positions is completely opaque to me. Full? Half? Quarter? Corner? Running? And all of these are some kind of “back”?
No. There’s the thrower. The catchers. And the guardians.
No. There’s the thrower. The catchers. And the guardians.
February 10, 2025 at 3:38 PM
The logic of football positions is completely opaque to me. Full? Half? Quarter? Corner? Running? And all of these are some kind of “back”?
No. There’s the thrower. The catchers. And the guardians.
No. There’s the thrower. The catchers. And the guardians.
Watching this man lose is perhaps the greatest theological victory I have witnessed in my lifetime.
February 10, 2025 at 2:53 AM
Watching this man lose is perhaps the greatest theological victory I have witnessed in my lifetime.
Rupert Murdoch is on screen at Super Bowl LIX and my wife starts whistling “The Farmer in the Dell.”
Marry up, people. Marry up. IYKYK
Marry up, people. Marry up. IYKYK
February 10, 2025 at 2:44 AM
Rupert Murdoch is on screen at Super Bowl LIX and my wife starts whistling “The Farmer in the Dell.”
Marry up, people. Marry up. IYKYK
Marry up, people. Marry up. IYKYK
Let’s be clear. Philadelphia is fake Boston. It’s worse in every way. But tonight, they are our brothers and sisters.
February 10, 2025 at 2:36 AM
Let’s be clear. Philadelphia is fake Boston. It’s worse in every way. But tonight, they are our brothers and sisters.
My small child: Daddy, can I tell you something?
Me: Sure
MSC: Christmas isn't all about presents.
Me: That's right!
MSC: It's about you getting presents for other people
🤣😅💀
Me: Sure
MSC: Christmas isn't all about presents.
Me: That's right!
MSC: It's about you getting presents for other people
🤣😅💀
December 13, 2024 at 4:25 PM
My small child: Daddy, can I tell you something?
Me: Sure
MSC: Christmas isn't all about presents.
Me: That's right!
MSC: It's about you getting presents for other people
🤣😅💀
Me: Sure
MSC: Christmas isn't all about presents.
Me: That's right!
MSC: It's about you getting presents for other people
🤣😅💀
So are they called "tweets" again or what?
December 12, 2024 at 3:57 PM
So are they called "tweets" again or what?