oldmankirkwood.bsky.social
@oldmankirkwood.bsky.social
July 18, 2025 at 10:24 PM
Why do onions have to fight back? Just let me eat you! #onions
July 13, 2025 at 6:00 PM
July 7, 2025 at 10:10 PM
No Nazis. Ever. I’ll never accept them.
January 23, 2025 at 9:15 PM
Old characters are so much fun. Just grizzled and stumpy! Next one, I want two items.
1) magical cane - turns into a sword or axe
2) walloping ammo

Gonna totter up to enemies I knock prone slow and steady! Won’t get away from me, Sonny!
#dnd #dungeonsanddragons #nerd #ttrpg
January 20, 2025 at 11:49 AM
Rainbows are from giants. They’re pointing out dragon lairs. It’s not a leprechauns pot of gold it’s a giant mean ass dragon that’s going to chomp on you. Cloud giants watch from above and use rainbows for mortals. Over time dragons pushed the narrative it’s a little Irish bro. #dnd #nerd #dragon
January 19, 2025 at 4:03 PM
Whenever I struggle to build a castle or dungeon layout I just go on Zillow and search houses out of my budget. Right now, a two bedroom one bath house is out of my budget. Kind of a short dungeon so…I guess more goblins in the attic to compensate. #dnd #dungeonsanddragons #ttrpg #nerd
January 17, 2025 at 1:40 AM
1 wyvern vs 80 pack pugs. I think the pugs can take on the wyvern. #dnd #dungeonsanddragons #dnd5e #magic
December 27, 2024 at 8:09 PM
December 19, 2024 at 6:54 PM
Vecna vs Tiamat? Obviously Tiamat. Tiamat didn’t lose an eyeball. And she still has all her limbs. Vecna? Someone tore him down for parts. #dnd #dungeonsanddragons
December 13, 2024 at 6:16 PM
I think a lich would make a great farmer! People get to live on his land and work, he gets a little nibble from their souls as they plow the fields and eat the food. Idk, spell shit n stuff makes it possible. Don’t think too hard on it! #dnd #dungeonsanddragons
December 13, 2024 at 1:37 PM
Grung cleric would be wild. Anytime you touch someone they’re poisoned! Healed but harmed. #dnd #dungeonsanddragoms
December 12, 2024 at 2:28 AM
Open the drawer to receive a reward! It’s a semordnilap. Fun to use in dnd puzzles! #dnd #dungeonsanddragons #puzzles
December 10, 2024 at 12:47 AM
Fourth Wing is STEAMY. I go into books blind now and I was not ready for this amount of steam 😂. #fourthwing #fantasy #scifi #books
December 2, 2024 at 11:27 PM
Jets pizza is instant heart burn but dang that crunchy crust is worth it. #pizza
December 2, 2024 at 12:16 AM
Deep fried a 13# turkey.
1. Let it dry out with a dry brine for a few days
2. Pull it out 3-4 hours beforehand or it’ll tank the temp of your oil. 350 oil.
3. Wow is it scary lol
4. Use two temp probes; turkey AND oil
5. Pull at 155
6. Rest 20 mins
7. Food coma

#turkey #thanksgiving #deepfried
November 28, 2024 at 7:14 PM
I love the idea of a pack pug curse. You find a pug in the woods and the owner tag reads your name. Next day 2 more show up. Then 4, 8, 16, 32…

To solve the curse you need to find the original and remove your name. #curse #dnd #dungeonsanddragons
November 27, 2024 at 1:17 PM
Anyone else feel cursed with their dice rolls? I roll a lot of 1’s. I played a Portent Wizard to get around it by using my 1’s for others. Now the monsters suck too! MUHAHAHAHAHA
November 26, 2024 at 12:17 PM
I keep seeing ads for my pets face on pajamas. I want my familiar instead! #dnd #dungeonsanddragons #ttrpg #tabletoproleplaying
November 24, 2024 at 11:49 AM
Clone Spell trap. Player steps on a plate. It turns ethereal green then shuts off. Think old school 90’s printer. They step on it repeatedly. Later, in the dungeon the party comes across a room with dozens of clones of the player all fighting. Clones don’t get along… #dnd #dungeonsanddragons
November 24, 2024 at 3:36 AM
I call this trap Tunnel of Love. 100’ tunnel with door at the end. 25’ dirt. 75’ paved stone. Party walks down tunnel turn to stone. It’s a silent alarm. Undead in dirt walls come out. Scythes turn on every 20’ swing. Door at end has Scroll of Fear spell when latch is pulled. #dnd
November 23, 2024 at 11:51 AM
Cloudkill is such a neat spell! It moves 10’ away from the caster. Players climb a mountain, evil wizard casts Cloudkill and it sinks down the cliff face! Dont know how to run it? Just do it horizontal as usual but it’s vertical. All about the perspective! #dnd #dumgeonsanddragons
November 23, 2024 at 2:16 AM