Only You! Yazoo or Flying Pickets depending on seasonality...

It was - and I can't stress this enough - a significant overstatement

I mean I once got locked in a flat and the "locksmith" the landlord sent round was a 50-something unshaven bloke (who claimed to be ex-Greek military) in a denim jacket that said "I'm somebody's reason to masturbate" on the back... I wasn't quite so reassured by this attire

I reckon Brian Blessed would be game for most things

You are missing out BIG TIME on the (albeit self declared) "world's greatest rock n roll band!"
Love a bit of doo-wop, great to dance to and the latest incarnation still plays live!

Since half the street got cats we're down to one robin and a blue tit... Even the house sparrows have packed up and left the tree they used to congregate in :(

Tekwin Whittok must've thought it was the Major’s...

Take the front off and create tiny diorama scenes within each one! Like a little series of Borrowers' rooms

You can't spell jacuzzi without jiz! Admittedly whilst involving some rearrangement of letters...

No line has ever made me want to book a holiday less than "we can't stop your kids peeing in the pool" 🤢

And to think he once nearly drowned, were it not for the friendly porpoises who bobbed him back to shore that time

And now I'm thinking about the time he claimed to have drifted out to sea on his surfboard but was bobbed back to shore by friendly porpoises who saved him from drowning