For a long time, I hated them, hated how they could treat me like that, but I can’t truly hold on to that. I can’t hate someone that I loved(excluding abuse and situations like those) I wish the best for them, that’s all. I wish things could’ve ended differently, but oh well!

Okay vent over!!

Now things aren’t completely back to normal, but this all led me to learning more about myself and how I could let someone affect me so much, on going therapy and such, I feel like I can finally put it behind me, learn and grow from it. I hate that traumatic experience often help us grow.

I’m not blame free though, after all of this I wasn’t my best and my behavior was erratic and I pushed boundaries trying to prove my worth and that led to a lot of destructive behaviors!

Only to find out that not even 2 weeks later she was already forming a relationship with a YouTuber superrad, this is when I hit a new low in self esteem, feeling like I was thrown to the wayside, like a piece of garbage, and gaslit at the same time.

She did it over text after I initially brought up some concerns to her which is hard for me due to the way I grew up. She essentially said “it’s me not you” and I took her word for it while pleading to see if there was anything I could do to help ease her stress.

Ahhh that one is so good!! Have so much fun!!!

Applay sauce morning!

Omg??? I’m actually so honored

:3