Most people get caught because they can't keep their mouth shut. Just can it. Never talk about your illegal activities.

Cops are absolutely GARBAGE at their jobs. The only reason they ever catch anybody is because of snitches. Don't snitch on yourself!

If you're doing illegal shit, which you shouldn't be, because we're all law respecters, but don't fucking post about it. It's bad enough TELLING people about it, but don't post about it. Christ.

The only person who should know about the illegal shit you get up to is YOU. Don't write it down. Fuck.

Sometimes you just have to wait for them to find it. Having multiple feeders helps.

Those sunflower seeds will attract a lot of different birds.

Black oil sunflower seeds are good for winter. Suet blocks too.

19 cars?!

I've owned... six. 😂

No, I was joking. 😂

Is it Kevin Harned?

I'd eat it.

This is what I was going to use to fry my frozen turkey. Now what am I supposed to do?

Okay, so Bigfoot exists but not the chupacabra? C'mon.

I think my wife got it at Buff City Soap? It definitely makes me way less ashy. 😂

I'm a fan of shower oil.

Not Prussia.

I play the cool mustache faction.