Just imagining a guy walking down the road eating an orange. See's a window open *throws orange through*

"Oh my god I'm so sorry about that, I can't help it"

*person in the flat rubbing the orange on the wall*

"No worries, me neither*

They're kissing 🥰

I filled in my passport application wrong and they wouldn't let me change it back. Found it was easier to just stick to it.

I'm transological

I know this is hella dull but I've not posted in ages and this is kinda what my life is like since the bathroom bill.

I'm just astonished at how little salt dishwashers actually use.

It's just so crazy in hindsight that the fridge freezer was more important than staff. To the point that the £20 expense of a fan wasn't reasonable for us, but it was for the fridge freezer.

Slim Shady is that you?

As I make myself coffee I realise as a fully remote company, I've not had coffee provided for me for some years now.

Guess you win some you lose some.

Sorry to call you out but I think you might be using neutypical/atypical as a humorism too. I made my point as a neurotypical person who, as far as I'm aware, is not selfish or a cowardly liar.

People love a simple solution

Skittles briefly sold in boxes in the UK about 10 years ago. I was compulsed to buy them but then for some reason I liked the packaging too much to eat them. At some point the sugar just melted through the cardboard and now I'm left with this life long science experiment. It's squishy!

Bro caught a shiny pokemon and released it back into the wild.

Why'd you have to go make him look cute though!

When you tweet so much you hit the paywall!