Emily J. Edwards
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msemilyedwards.bsky.social
Emily J. Edwards
@msemilyedwards.bsky.social
4.3K followers 470 following 12K posts
She/Her. Author based in beautiful Los Angeles. Staunch woman. Links to podcasts, projects, and books: linktr.ee/msemilyedwards
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msemilyedwards.bsky.social
okay, angelenos. if you need a gate, do i freaking have the guy for you. jorge barragan at barragan ironworks. incredible customer service, excellent price, top notch work. would trust him with anything. is this a sexy photo? no. but i have to tell everyone i can about this guy.
a black ironwork gate across a driveway
November 11, 2025 at 7:12 PM
msemilyedwards.bsky.social
oh no, i just realized that thanks to BOB’S BURGERS i need to start making a dutch baby for christmas eve dinner
a scene from bob’s burgers. linda is in a diner in a brown coat. she is accepting a to go box from a server in a blue shirt. she says “oh, it’s a preemie just like jesus!”
November 9, 2025 at 3:23 AM
msemilyedwards.bsky.social
vote for miette
the zohran sign generator that says JAIL for Mother the zohran sign generator that says JAIL for mother for 1,000 years
November 9, 2025 at 1:06 AM
msemilyedwards.bsky.social
Happy 3rd Publish-iversary to my first book, Viviana Valentine Gets Her Man! It has been a wild (and stressful) past three years. I didn't have as much time as I wanted to debut Viv to the world, but I'm glad there are people who love her as much as I do! www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/711852...
the cover of the book VIVIANA VALENTINE GETS HER MAN. that text appears above the image with a bold midcentury sans serif font. the image is of a cartoon woman sitting at a desk with her feet up, wearing a green dress. by her feet is a typewriter and a gun. in the drawer of the desk, a bottle of whiskey.
November 8, 2025 at 3:34 PM
msemilyedwards.bsky.social
Ticking Clock starts on New Year's Eve, but if you're in the mood for a Thanksgiving mystery, check out book two, VIVIANA VALENTINE GOES UP THE RIVER

www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/717309...
the cover of VIVIANA VALENTINE GOES UP THE RIVER. that text is written in bold, sans serif midcentury font. it hovers above a cartoon woman in a green dress, smoking a cigarette. in the background, a large, cream-colored mansion sits with a white car approaching it.
November 7, 2025 at 4:36 PM
msemilyedwards.bsky.social
Happy Second Publish-iversary to VIVIANA VALENTINE AND THE TICKING CLOCK! It came out 364 days after VIVIANA VALENTINE GETS HER MAN, so tomorrow I'll be just as obnoxious about my book babies :-)

www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/729815...
the cover of VIVIANA VALENTINE AND THE TICKING CLOCK. that text is written in bold mid-century sans-serif text, above the image of a cartoon woman in a yellow trench coat walking down an alley. behind her, the shadow of a man looms. she is walking towards times square.
November 7, 2025 at 4:34 PM
msemilyedwards.bsky.social
Does anyone know where this cartoon is from? Because it's basically my whole personality now that I'm crone aged.
What to do if there's a witch at your door step one: invite them in step two: make tea step three: plot against the puritans
November 6, 2025 at 10:59 PM
msemilyedwards.bsky.social
don’t worry i also had cornichons
off work late? hungry, but too tired to cook? try 30 to 40 olives 30 to 40 olives an easy weeknight dinner eat them directly out of the jar with your fingers you will certainly not regret eating 30 to 40 olives
November 6, 2025 at 1:25 AM
msemilyedwards.bsky.social
The GOP voters are trotting this chestnut on FB out whenever a Democrat wins and it's honestly... insane? Who introduced these people to lowercase-p proverbs? they can't handle the responsibility.
"Even as the forest got smaller and smaller, the trees kept voting for the axe. For the axe was clever, and had convinced the trees that because its handle was made of wood it was one of them."
November 5, 2025 at 4:53 PM
msemilyedwards.bsky.social
live from the white house, probably
Sean Leahy @thepunningman "The bond's Name. James Name" Pleased to... what? "Bond Name's the james" Are you alright? "Bames Nond's having a stronk, call a Bondulance" 9:33 AM - 2 Dec 2014
November 5, 2025 at 4:35 AM
msemilyedwards.bsky.social
what i ordered vs what i got
a natural and wobbly beige ceramic bread basket. a plastic glitter monstrosity in the shape of a purple townhome decorated with fake trees and snow
November 5, 2025 at 4:15 AM
msemilyedwards.bsky.social
TO THIS DAY my husband and i will say "peppered pretty good" as often as we can slip it into conversation
Cheney shoots lawyer in hunt accident This article is more than 19 years old Dan Glaister Sun 12 Feb 2006 20.43 EST Share Never sneak up behind Dick Cheney when he has a gun in his hand. That is the painful lesson learned by Texas lawyer Harry Whittington, 78, in a hunting accident at the weekend. Mr Whittington, the United States vice-president, and a third person went quail shooting on Saturday at one of the grandest ranches in Texas. While Mr Cheney and the third man laid in wait for the quail, Mr Whittington approached them from behind without signalling his presence. Just then the quail were flushed out. The owner of the ranch, Katharine Armstrong, witnessed the incident. "The vice-president didn't see him," she told the Associated Press news agency. "He picked out a bird and shot and, my God, Harry was in the line of fire and got peppered pretty good."
November 4, 2025 at 4:50 PM
msemilyedwards.bsky.social
i know i'm late but
a still from an old episode of the 1960s tv show "password." on the right is some white guy in glasses and a brown coat, on the left is betty white in a yellow dress. the image is changed so that the password on the white card facing betty says "louvre"
November 3, 2025 at 11:39 PM
msemilyedwards.bsky.social
well the good news is
a white beer can with festive lettering and decorations. it’s shiner holiday cheer!
November 3, 2025 at 8:53 PM
msemilyedwards.bsky.social
y'all, they're auctioning off the ACTUAL BUSTS from the Muppet Christmas Carol

the way... the way i SCREAMED
four fake busts of aristotle, dante, moliere, and shakespeare (missing his nose). they are on an auction site and each is up to at least three thousand dollars.
November 2, 2025 at 3:16 AM
msemilyedwards.bsky.social
guys, saint patrick moved to LA and has significantly raised his prices.
an image of a garter snake pressed up against silver mesh. text says: Protect your pets and property against snakes. $999,999
November 1, 2025 at 11:15 PM
msemilyedwards.bsky.social
Sam’s Gotcha Day/Today
a small gray and white pit bull puppy standing over a woman’s leg, on a purple carpet. a gray and white cat is sitting by, apprehensively. a large gray and white pit bull dog standing next to a brown leather sofa
November 1, 2025 at 4:09 PM
msemilyedwards.bsky.social
i like to remind him every now and then that The Dog is an earned title and our boy cat is more than capable of carrying out the duties of The Dog, so he better get his act together. thankfully, sam stepped up and has been dutifully slobbering on this toy all morning.
a large gray and white pit bull type dog bands next to a brown leather sofa, gnawing on a black ring toy
November 1, 2025 at 4:00 PM
msemilyedwards.bsky.social
like:
photo of a rear end of a black pickup truck. in its bed is a cardboard box that says COMPLETE TOILET. above the box, a text overlay says “he sounds like a”
October 30, 2025 at 1:36 AM
msemilyedwards.bsky.social
I'm about to celebrate the release-anniversaries of two of my books! Viviana Valentine Gets Her Man's 3rd birthday is November 8th and Viviana Valentine and the Ticking Clock's 2nd birthday is November 7th! www.penguinrandomhouse.com/authors/2274...
three books in the Girl Friday mystery series- Viviana Valentine Gets Her Man, Viviana Valentine Goes Up The River, and Viviana Valentine and the Ticking Clock. Each features a cartoon brunette woman in a green dress.
October 29, 2025 at 5:28 PM
msemilyedwards.bsky.social
I have tons of new people following me, so I should do one of these:

Hi! I'm Emily. I'm an author (www.penguinrandomhouse.com/authors/2274...), podcaster (podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/t...) & writer. I try to make people laugh. I write about sleuths in a newsletter: msemilyedwards.com/blog/
a lineup of the Viviana Valentine/Girl Friday Mystery books, featuring Viviana Valentine Gets Her Man, Viviana Valentine Goes Up the River, and Viviana Valentine and the Ticking Clock. Each features a cartoon brunette woman in a green dress.
October 28, 2025 at 6:56 PM
msemilyedwards.bsky.social
my neighbor has orange-glowing halloween lights outside their house and *every single time* i look out the window i think the hill is on fire because i can see the lights through the *exact same window* i first saw the eaton fire. i keep getting jumpscared at night!

i never want to see this again:
a nighttime photo of the glow of the eaton fire behind trees, through a window pane.
October 27, 2025 at 2:10 PM
msemilyedwards.bsky.social
i like that apparently the hair and makeup team for THE ROCKETEER used this lady as inspo for Jennifer Connolly
a screen grab from CREATURE FROM THE BLACK ALGOON with a slimy boat captain- you can tell by the hat- and a woman who is too clean to have been on a boat for the past week.
October 26, 2025 at 2:04 AM
msemilyedwards.bsky.social
i always check the yard for coyotes when i go out but, uh, breaking news, now i have to check the trees?

(that fence is easily 7 feet tall.)
a wild coyote standing on a concrete block fence. and staring at the photographer.
October 25, 2025 at 11:21 PM
msemilyedwards.bsky.social
“was hoping for the bookshop girl in THE BIG SLEEP, my mistake”
October 25, 2025 at 8:23 PM