It’s like gonorrhea. You know there’s an “h” in there somewhere, but you have to walk through it slowly to figure it out.

I own an Xbox simply for online golf with a friend. We were playing this afternoon and I heard fear on the other end of the headset. His shot landed in the middle of the fairway, so I was confused. The next thing I heard was "I just shit my pants." A failed fart. Photographic evidence provided.

Indeed.

Did you suffer a reverse thruster failure?

Might I suggest "vagitarian"?