Andre
@mortus.bsky.social
I’m Andre
I love movies, video games, television and other nerdy media.
I used to do stand up and podcasts
Now I mostly just Dad
I love movies, video games, television and other nerdy media.
I used to do stand up and podcasts
Now I mostly just Dad
Alexa, draw me a picture of Donald Trump with a speech bubble that says “I’m the only one who can save America” as he is taking a massive shit on top of the US Constitution. Don’t forget to add Steve Bannon off to the side, waiting to taste the shit.
October 24, 2025 at 4:07 PM
Alexa, draw me a picture of Donald Trump with a speech bubble that says “I’m the only one who can save America” as he is taking a massive shit on top of the US Constitution. Don’t forget to add Steve Bannon off to the side, waiting to taste the shit.
Which adjective describes you today mister?
July 26, 2025 at 2:35 AM
Which adjective describes you today mister?
Immigrants are so cool. We should have more not less.
June 9, 2025 at 1:52 PM
Immigrants are so cool. We should have more not less.
Mario Kart World online is very humbling and I’ll be going back to Zelda now GOODNIGHT
June 7, 2025 at 4:34 AM
Mario Kart World online is very humbling and I’ll be going back to Zelda now GOODNIGHT
Threw on Toy Story 3 for my toddler while I was cooking dinner. Wasn’t paying attention; I’ve seen it. Just sat down to eat as the toys were heading into the furnace. Immediate tears. Ok whatever, that’s a crazy part of the movie. Now Andy’s mom is sending him to college and I’m BAWLING, WTF PIXAR 😭
June 5, 2025 at 2:18 AM
Threw on Toy Story 3 for my toddler while I was cooking dinner. Wasn’t paying attention; I’ve seen it. Just sat down to eat as the toys were heading into the furnace. Immediate tears. Ok whatever, that’s a crazy part of the movie. Now Andy’s mom is sending him to college and I’m BAWLING, WTF PIXAR 😭
Wordle 1,433 4/6
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Pure insanity today on wordle
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Pure insanity today on wordle
May 22, 2025 at 4:47 PM
Wordle 1,433 4/6
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⬜🟨🟨⬜⬜
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
Pure insanity today on wordle
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Pure insanity today on wordle
I’m not done with Andor yet but it has been a very fulfilling journey this season. It’s very convenient that we are getting a step-by-step guide on how to “tear this shit out of this place” in this prestige tv show in 2025. Yes, let’s!
May 16, 2025 at 12:36 PM
I’m not done with Andor yet but it has been a very fulfilling journey this season. It’s very convenient that we are getting a step-by-step guide on how to “tear this shit out of this place” in this prestige tv show in 2025. Yes, let’s!
If I had a twin we would be named Smoke and Snack. I’d be Smoke. But that normally leads to a fun lil Sister Sister switcheroo where I gotta be Snackin
May 13, 2025 at 5:32 AM
If I had a twin we would be named Smoke and Snack. I’d be Smoke. But that normally leads to a fun lil Sister Sister switcheroo where I gotta be Snackin
Pro Disneyworld Dad Tip: take the diaper bag into the bathroom every time whether you are changing the baby or not. Give your little gooch a breather with the baby wipes.
May 4, 2025 at 2:26 PM
Pro Disneyworld Dad Tip: take the diaper bag into the bathroom every time whether you are changing the baby or not. Give your little gooch a breather with the baby wipes.
I got 99 problems but a bitch ain’t one
The bitch:
The bitch:
a gorilla is walking across a grassy field in a forest .
ALT: a gorilla is walking across a grassy field in a forest .
media.tenor.com
May 1, 2025 at 3:57 PM
I got 99 problems but a bitch ain’t one
The bitch:
The bitch:
Walmart really came in clutch, I'm getting a Switch 2! Good luck and godspeed
April 24, 2025 at 5:43 AM
Walmart really came in clutch, I'm getting a Switch 2! Good luck and godspeed
I'm in an infinite Switch 2 hell-loop on Target
April 24, 2025 at 4:19 AM
I'm in an infinite Switch 2 hell-loop on Target
Reposted by Andre
lol target is the only site that lets me get to checkout and then it doesn't go through.
April 24, 2025 at 4:16 AM
lol target is the only site that lets me get to checkout and then it doesn't go through.
I’m playing The Last of Us Part II on PS5 for the first time. Trying to beat it so I dont get spoiled and can watch the show/see the differences. I did something in the game last night that made me so sad, I don’t know if I’ll pick it back up again tonight. The world is not ready for this on HBO
a man in a suit and tie is pointing his finger
ALT: a man in a suit and tie is pointing his finger
media.tenor.com
April 17, 2025 at 6:25 PM
I’m playing The Last of Us Part II on PS5 for the first time. Trying to beat it so I dont get spoiled and can watch the show/see the differences. I did something in the game last night that made me so sad, I don’t know if I’ll pick it back up again tonight. The world is not ready for this on HBO
This spring, Pedro Pascal stars as Father Figure
This Summer, Pedro Pascal stars as Daddy
This Fall, Pedro Pascal stars as Papa
This Winter, Pedro Pascal stars as The Impregnator
This Summer, Pedro Pascal stars as Daddy
This Fall, Pedro Pascal stars as Papa
This Winter, Pedro Pascal stars as The Impregnator
April 17, 2025 at 2:45 PM
This spring, Pedro Pascal stars as Father Figure
This Summer, Pedro Pascal stars as Daddy
This Fall, Pedro Pascal stars as Papa
This Winter, Pedro Pascal stars as The Impregnator
This Summer, Pedro Pascal stars as Daddy
This Fall, Pedro Pascal stars as Papa
This Winter, Pedro Pascal stars as The Impregnator
RFK Jr is really inspirational honestly. He makes me believe that I can be qualified for literally any job on earth without any of the knowledge necessary to succeed.
April 10, 2025 at 7:24 PM
RFK Jr is really inspirational honestly. He makes me believe that I can be qualified for literally any job on earth without any of the knowledge necessary to succeed.
Commuting to work is super cool cuz you can make a new mortal enemy who threateningly follows you directly behind your bumper for 45 minutes without even having to ever see their face cuz their windows are tinted, all on accident! Maybe someone will run me off the road on my way home yay RTO!!!!!!!!
April 10, 2025 at 3:05 PM
Commuting to work is super cool cuz you can make a new mortal enemy who threateningly follows you directly behind your bumper for 45 minutes without even having to ever see their face cuz their windows are tinted, all on accident! Maybe someone will run me off the road on my way home yay RTO!!!!!!!!
Flip floppin ass bitch
a pair of flip flops are laying on the ground next to rocks
ALT: a pair of flip flops are laying on the ground next to rocks
media.tenor.com
April 9, 2025 at 9:44 PM
Flip floppin ass bitch
Alright yall White Lotus is over, time to go back to worrying about the horrid state of our union. Oh snap, The Last of Us starts Sunday? Nevermind! #nintendoswitch2 #avengersdoomsday #superman
April 7, 2025 at 3:28 PM
Alright yall White Lotus is over, time to go back to worrying about the horrid state of our union. Oh snap, The Last of Us starts Sunday? Nevermind! #nintendoswitch2 #avengersdoomsday #superman
Living in America in 2025
April 3, 2025 at 6:20 PM
Living in America in 2025
The most fascinating character on The White Lotus is Jason Isaac’s character. Murder-suicides happen a lot and when I read those stories I always think “why?” But Mr. Malfoy is really showing it as a deeply fucked up, misaligned, bad version of love. He’s saving them from his bad decisions. Yikes!
a man in a plaid shirt is making a funny face and says `` please ... don 't do that '' .
ALT: a man in a plaid shirt is making a funny face and says `` please ... don 't do that '' .
media.tenor.com
April 1, 2025 at 4:05 PM
The most fascinating character on The White Lotus is Jason Isaac’s character. Murder-suicides happen a lot and when I read those stories I always think “why?” But Mr. Malfoy is really showing it as a deeply fucked up, misaligned, bad version of love. He’s saving them from his bad decisions. Yikes!
I’m just so disappointed in Gaitok
March 17, 2025 at 2:37 PM
I’m just so disappointed in Gaitok
I don’t have an Xbox. I pay for Game Pass Ultimate and play games on PC. My PC is becoming more and more outdated every day BUT the cloud streaming from Gamepass has really been kicking ass recently. I’ve played Avowed for like 20 hours, it’s mostly been cloud and I’ve had very few issues. Hooray!
February 24, 2025 at 9:00 PM
I don’t have an Xbox. I pay for Game Pass Ultimate and play games on PC. My PC is becoming more and more outdated every day BUT the cloud streaming from Gamepass has really been kicking ass recently. I’ve played Avowed for like 20 hours, it’s mostly been cloud and I’ve had very few issues. Hooray!
I’d like to dare every other billionaire on earth to go ahead and donate over half their wealth to charitable organizations please www.msn.com/en-us/money/...
MSN
www.msn.com
February 19, 2025 at 11:44 PM
I’d like to dare every other billionaire on earth to go ahead and donate over half their wealth to charitable organizations please www.msn.com/en-us/money/...