Dreams in the gutter

As Trevor will tell you, "I'm not good at this adult shit."

Can't spell 'felon' without 'Elon'

My girlfriend: watching me miss my mouth with a candy, lose it in my hair, dig around in my hair for *far* too long, then get excited upon finding it and immediately tossing it into my mouth.

"Hot."

They should make butt plugs with siren whistles in them. Less embarrassing, objectively more amusing.

Why is six afraid of seven?

Because seven is a registered six offender!