finally left my house for another gay collage night. Might add more to this of my own stuff might leave it lol

Hmm maybe being sick all the time and being gaslit by my entire country has something to do with it

✨ #oc #art

THank yoUUUUU💜

so fucking depressed it's unreal

I'm glad you guys get it 💚

I used to be like oh I need a real reason
No I think if you're annoying to me in the slightest thats a perfect enough reason lol

Is astounding the mental toll it takes off your shoulders when you're seeing people living different lives entirely in a different place. like legit I think if I am not able to travel at least one small trip a year I'd go actually insane LOL I NEED TO KNOW PEOPLE ARE ELSEWHERE

With just working on what you're able to work on rn to take back the autonomy of living in a place you don't want to. For me at least if i have something to look forward to like a goal with where I wanna be in a few years it helps. Hell, like I said even just traveling when you're able to-

on the flipside too, every place has issues that you'll find. Going to a big city will also probably make you feel insane in ways but I think it's just about gauging what it is that you want from life and your living situation, yknow? Easier travel, more third spaces, ect ect. I think it starts-

I think you can at least find some peace in it. Cos when you're just going to work everyday and then seeing the horrors and then going home and not engaging with anything outside of those two things it's really easy to become super jaded about it all. It sucks, but that's small town living I fear-

Yeah I understand. I mean I know you felt this way too about the other place you were at which was definitely more hellish IMO like, I think for me it's like, I love the community here but you actually have to really engage with it if you want to not feel insane because it is small, but once you do-

I say all this because I've been spiraling about being here and feeling insane in most ways rn too about myself. It might sound silly too but even just getting a piercing or a tattoo sometimes can quell the demons temporarily

And if you ever just feel stir crazy for real we can just go do a local craft night or something, make the best of it while we can. Imo the best way to take back yourself when you feel lost is to delve into creativity as a form of resistance bc it's extremely human and they can't take that from us