also I am literally a student and have full time and part time jobs… wishing to be offered understanding and care like everyone else

It is hard not to feel abandoned when people I care for don’t have the capacity or desire to see me as a person but I am grounded by the reminder that it is truly an honor and a blessing to practice discipline, trust, and interdependence with others. that is what saves me

It is hard work to really see each other, especially under the violence of capitalism and a culture of disposability.. it’s uncomfortable and takes time to nourish intimacy and I am grateful for those in my life who make me feel seen despite how heavy everything is

deepening my relationship with myself over time has brought more clarity but it’s still just as painful to lose relationship and I hold seemingly endless grief over people. especially when there is so much talk around relying on community for safety and survival