Steven White
@middlerelief.bsky.social
Emmy-losing writer/producer currently in zero Hall of Fames.
If you see this face,
A) Your very soul just got dump trucked,
and
B) You're about to hear something like "Head's up, buttercup" but it absolutely changes your life.
#ThePitt
A) Your very soul just got dump trucked,
and
B) You're about to hear something like "Head's up, buttercup" but it absolutely changes your life.
#ThePitt
March 21, 2025 at 1:07 AM
If you see this face,
A) Your very soul just got dump trucked,
and
B) You're about to hear something like "Head's up, buttercup" but it absolutely changes your life.
#ThePitt
A) Your very soul just got dump trucked,
and
B) You're about to hear something like "Head's up, buttercup" but it absolutely changes your life.
#ThePitt
“Seems late in the game to still have raw pork” — Top Chef, bay-beeeeee!
March 14, 2025 at 12:32 PM
“Seems late in the game to still have raw pork” — Top Chef, bay-beeeeee!
First guy to get leprosy from an armadillo, there’s a story.
March 13, 2025 at 8:29 PM
First guy to get leprosy from an armadillo, there’s a story.
Here for a Beast Mortos-Speedball Mike Bailey Best of 101 series #AEWDynamite
March 13, 2025 at 2:37 AM
Here for a Beast Mortos-Speedball Mike Bailey Best of 101 series #AEWDynamite
Power Slap but for friends saying what they really think of your shoes
March 6, 2025 at 12:42 AM
Power Slap but for friends saying what they really think of your shoes
Ummm DOGE just emailed to ask me if I have any pages on how white guys order Mexican food?
March 5, 2025 at 1:24 AM
Ummm DOGE just emailed to ask me if I have any pages on how white guys order Mexican food?
Aw man Slack is down, who’s going to read my pithy comments about email structure?!
February 26, 2025 at 5:35 PM
Aw man Slack is down, who’s going to read my pithy comments about email structure?!
Wife got home from her trip yesterday, so she should be all unpacked in about 4 years.
February 24, 2025 at 3:21 PM
Wife got home from her trip yesterday, so she should be all unpacked in about 4 years.
How often are you supposed to change dryer sheets? I’m still on the one that came with the house.
February 20, 2025 at 2:58 AM
How often are you supposed to change dryer sheets? I’m still on the one that came with the house.
Reposted by Steven White
Because laughter makes the world go round 🤣 Caption This 👇
January 23, 2025 at 5:25 PM
Because laughter makes the world go round 🤣 Caption This 👇
“Let’s go tongues!” Said the creepiest guy in your dorm.
February 10, 2025 at 1:03 AM
“Let’s go tongues!” Said the creepiest guy in your dorm.
TAILS NEVER FAILS
February 9, 2025 at 11:37 PM
TAILS NEVER FAILS
Amazing I don’t know anyone who’s been on House Hunters. Or murdered.
February 6, 2025 at 3:45 AM
Amazing I don’t know anyone who’s been on House Hunters. Or murdered.
If I didn’t want to ever be known as a wrestling fan, I wouldn’t do something close to John Cena’s “you can’t see me”. Would not even put my hand by my face. That’s not an option.
B/c if I did, people would see me as a Nazi- er, sorry “wrestling fan”. That would be a signal.
B/c if I did, people would see me as a Nazi- er, sorry “wrestling fan”. That would be a signal.
January 21, 2025 at 1:06 PM
If I didn’t want to ever be known as a wrestling fan, I wouldn’t do something close to John Cena’s “you can’t see me”. Would not even put my hand by my face. That’s not an option.
B/c if I did, people would see me as a Nazi- er, sorry “wrestling fan”. That would be a signal.
B/c if I did, people would see me as a Nazi- er, sorry “wrestling fan”. That would be a signal.
Somehow, we all just agreed to stop calling it the Willenium.
January 16, 2025 at 1:48 AM
Somehow, we all just agreed to stop calling it the Willenium.
Gronk and Sam Elliott can both clearly afford their own house.
January 15, 2025 at 4:34 AM
Gronk and Sam Elliott can both clearly afford their own house.
“You’ll be visited by three spirits…”
The three spirits:
The three spirits:
three men dressed as mariachis stand in a dirt field
ALT: three men dressed as mariachis stand in a dirt field
media.tenor.com
December 25, 2024 at 1:24 PM
“You’ll be visited by three spirits…”
The three spirits:
The three spirits:
You never know it’s the last time you slammed your laptop shut.
December 21, 2024 at 1:29 AM
You never know it’s the last time you slammed your laptop shut.
NOSFERATU serves as a vital reminder that no matter how demonic a vampire may appear, they remain totes horny.
December 17, 2024 at 6:08 PM
NOSFERATU serves as a vital reminder that no matter how demonic a vampire may appear, they remain totes horny.
Can’t wait to get some brew dogs and watch Conclave with the boys.
December 13, 2024 at 1:06 PM
Can’t wait to get some brew dogs and watch Conclave with the boys.
Thirsty ass whale
A male humpback whale set a record by swimming more than 8,000 miles from South America to Africa and traversing at least three oceans — most likely in search of a mate, researchers said.
Humpback Whale Sets Record for How Far It Traveled
The adult male swam more than 8,000 miles from South America to Africa, most likely in search of a mate, researchers said.
www.nytimes.com
December 13, 2024 at 1:02 PM
Thirsty ass whale
Love the Blacklist. The log-lines are either:
ILLUSIONS OF GRANDEUR: A Victorian socialite must invent time travel if they hope to stop the love of their life from starting the Vietnam War.
OR
DEB: The story of Deb.
ILLUSIONS OF GRANDEUR: A Victorian socialite must invent time travel if they hope to stop the love of their life from starting the Vietnam War.
OR
DEB: The story of Deb.
December 12, 2024 at 12:00 AM
Love the Blacklist. The log-lines are either:
ILLUSIONS OF GRANDEUR: A Victorian socialite must invent time travel if they hope to stop the love of their life from starting the Vietnam War.
OR
DEB: The story of Deb.
ILLUSIONS OF GRANDEUR: A Victorian socialite must invent time travel if they hope to stop the love of their life from starting the Vietnam War.
OR
DEB: The story of Deb.
Who let Tom Brady eat a strawberry?!
December 8, 2024 at 11:28 PM
Who let Tom Brady eat a strawberry?!
Here’s something from me on this Giving Tuesday— an unsubscribe!
(Studio audience laughs, high-fives are given between the writers, a lot cat is backed over by an Express Messenger van)
(Studio audience laughs, high-fives are given between the writers, a lot cat is backed over by an Express Messenger van)
December 3, 2024 at 11:14 PM
Here’s something from me on this Giving Tuesday— an unsubscribe!
(Studio audience laughs, high-fives are given between the writers, a lot cat is backed over by an Express Messenger van)
(Studio audience laughs, high-fives are given between the writers, a lot cat is backed over by an Express Messenger van)