Michael Brogan ツ
@michaeltbrogan.bsky.social
Daily Comedy for All. (Allegedly.)
Old time blues, running shoes,
stage cues, warped views.
💙 Blue Dot in the Midwest
Old time blues, running shoes,
stage cues, warped views.
💙 Blue Dot in the Midwest
Not sure if I should take my kids to this performance, due to the sax and violins.
December 30, 2025 at 1:09 PM
Not sure if I should take my kids to this performance, due to the sax and violins.
If procrastination were an Olympic sport, I’d compete tomorrow.
December 29, 2025 at 12:45 PM
If procrastination were an Olympic sport, I’d compete tomorrow.
When your gal says to just get her something that makes her look sexy—trust me, it’s not an exercise bike.
December 28, 2025 at 1:19 PM
When your gal says to just get her something that makes her look sexy—trust me, it’s not an exercise bike.
I wonder how many letters Satan got from dyslexic kids this year.
December 27, 2025 at 1:29 PM
I wonder how many letters Satan got from dyslexic kids this year.
My wife and I told our son, “We’re going to Disney World!” He was so excited. I don’t know why—we never said he was coming.
December 26, 2025 at 1:40 PM
My wife and I told our son, “We’re going to Disney World!” He was so excited. I don’t know why—we never said he was coming.
Nothing like the joy on a child’s face when he first sees the iPhone box containing the socks I got him for Christmas.
December 25, 2025 at 1:15 PM
Nothing like the joy on a child’s face when he first sees the iPhone box containing the socks I got him for Christmas.
We’re normalizing weird weather this year. I’m seeing nativity scenes with both palm trees AND snow.
December 24, 2025 at 12:48 PM
We’re normalizing weird weather this year. I’m seeing nativity scenes with both palm trees AND snow.
Hope my girlfriend is okay. She barely mentioned the 184 birds I gave her over the 12 days of Christmas.
December 23, 2025 at 12:49 PM
Hope my girlfriend is okay. She barely mentioned the 184 birds I gave her over the 12 days of Christmas.
My girlfriend told me, “I want something to go around my finger that’s sparkly and I can show off to my friends.” I think she’ll love the LED yo-yo I got her!
December 22, 2025 at 12:30 PM
My girlfriend told me, “I want something to go around my finger that’s sparkly and I can show off to my friends.” I think she’ll love the LED yo-yo I got her!
Why would you even want to ride in a one horse open sleigh? At least add a cover and some wi-fi.
December 21, 2025 at 1:34 PM
Why would you even want to ride in a one horse open sleigh? At least add a cover and some wi-fi.
Tried to order some tennis balls online, but the site kept crashing. Must be a problem with their server.
December 20, 2025 at 1:28 PM
Tried to order some tennis balls online, but the site kept crashing. Must be a problem with their server.
It’s not widely known, but most sailors can sing quite well—those High Cs really carry them away!
December 19, 2025 at 12:49 PM
It’s not widely known, but most sailors can sing quite well—those High Cs really carry them away!
When I was little, Mom used to get me to eat by saying, “Here comes the choo-choo train!” Otherwise, she wouldn’t untie me from the tracks.
December 18, 2025 at 12:44 PM
When I was little, Mom used to get me to eat by saying, “Here comes the choo-choo train!” Otherwise, she wouldn’t untie me from the tracks.
I always write “congrats” because I can never remember how to spell congrajulashuns.
December 17, 2025 at 12:27 PM
I always write “congrats” because I can never remember how to spell congrajulashuns.
Microwaves tend to wash up on tiny beaches.
December 16, 2025 at 12:24 PM
Microwaves tend to wash up on tiny beaches.
I’ll sell my broken watch when the time is right.
December 15, 2025 at 12:50 PM
I’ll sell my broken watch when the time is right.
Don’t worry if you get buried in snow—someone will help soon. Just sit there and chill.
December 14, 2025 at 1:16 PM
Don’t worry if you get buried in snow—someone will help soon. Just sit there and chill.
Washington state is rainy, but its highest mountain is rainier.
December 13, 2025 at 1:00 PM
Washington state is rainy, but its highest mountain is rainier.
Was surprised Kenny Loggins' Christmas album is called "December" and not "Highway To the Manger Zone".
December 12, 2025 at 12:49 PM
Was surprised Kenny Loggins' Christmas album is called "December" and not "Highway To the Manger Zone".
“I’d rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy.”~Dorothy Parker
December 11, 2025 at 1:13 PM
“I’d rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy.”~Dorothy Parker
“Of all the guys I know, you're one of them.” What does she mean?
December 10, 2025 at 12:20 PM
“Of all the guys I know, you're one of them.” What does she mean?
“Things do not become legal just because the president wants to do them.” ~Richard Nixon, 1977 interview
“I’ve seen better swings on a playground.” ~also Nixon
“I’ve seen better swings on a playground.” ~also Nixon
December 9, 2025 at 12:53 PM
“Things do not become legal just because the president wants to do them.” ~Richard Nixon, 1977 interview
“I’ve seen better swings on a playground.” ~also Nixon
“I’ve seen better swings on a playground.” ~also Nixon
I’m learning to trust Mexican trains despite their having loco motives.
December 8, 2025 at 12:48 PM
I’m learning to trust Mexican trains despite their having loco motives.
Whoever invented Tic-Tacs, must have made a mint.
December 7, 2025 at 1:03 PM
Whoever invented Tic-Tacs, must have made a mint.
Just saw three people jogging outside and it inspired me to get up and close the blinds.
December 6, 2025 at 1:38 PM
Just saw three people jogging outside and it inspired me to get up and close the blinds.