My first Bluesky earthquake and I didn't feel a thing. (That's what he said)

Me running through the Labyrinth, prepared to battle the Goblin King, asking the worm people if they got any Tums

Are you home for the holiday? Stopping by your hometown comic shop? Tell 'em to order "Greetings from the Maglev"! Last day to order is FRIDAY!

Tis the season for a cold breeze to kiss the bit of your belly that hangs over your pants.

The Neutron Dance started playing at Trader Joes and everyone started fucking in the chip aisle.

I'm not here for a long time, I'm here for a good time.*

*but also a long time and an okay time

Me trying to figure out who im gonna be on this app

Hogwarts.
What a terrible name.
Where'd you go to magic school? I went to Pigdickgonorrhea.