I cannot tell you the last time a package, especially a USPS one, arrived even *remotely* close to estimates.

It is downright comical how many packages get lost on their way to my house. I’m already on my 4th for the year.

I live in a subdivision in the burbs - it’s not like I’m hard to find.

I approach life with a certain “Jungle Cruise skipper” energy that often goes unappreciated by others.

Desperately want to sit in on the meetings where they decide on the brand names for prescription medications.

Asked to pick a super-power, pick often pick flight, super-strength, teleportation, etc.

I just want the ability to always know what the weird noise I just heard was.

Ah, a new place for my dumbass shower thoughts