You’re my Gay Lourde

I think that someone decided to sell ppl on the idea of Easter baskets for Halloween called “boo baskets” which then became brrr baskets for winter/xmas? It’s just rich moms on tiktok making up fake capitalist traditions so they can spend $650 at target, as far as I can tell.

My condolences to your mentions

I mean, he was at a piano bar.

Eating corn methodically like a typewriter

A single bean carved thinly like a roast

“Don’t threaten me bc my great grandfather was a war criminal and I have learned how to commit atrocities by osmosis from generational abuse” k bud

Colleges in Florida have minimum requirements for writing/reading called the Gordon Rule. The lore 20 years ago was that a state politician’s son graduated with a BA in FL without being able to read. I can’t find anything to back that up but it would not surprise me.

I think chaps are going to be the answer to any problem

Yes Twitter had bots and trolls and corporate mascots tweeting promo codes. But at some point the tide turned where everyone was just asking me to subscribe, buy, follow elsewhere with no other engagement.

You might say it’s a Good Thing

Here they are all becoming cash-only mushroom stores

😭😭😭

Bye bitches, good luck with your Medicare

This did not mean what I thought it meant the first time I read it