Maximilian Ximenez
@maxximenez.bsky.social
Literary agent, Fortean psychonaut, freelance demiurge and self-defined "asexual libertine." The Eternal September and its consequences have been a disaster for the human race.
All inquiries to email.
All inquiries to email.
Alpha Trion's alt mode should be a custom airbrushed van with a wizard who looks like his robot mode on the side
November 22, 2025 at 12:04 AM
Alpha Trion's alt mode should be a custom airbrushed van with a wizard who looks like his robot mode on the side
So one of the interesting things that I'm going through right now is that my boomer mom is getting diagnosed with ADHD in her golden years. I wonder if one of the reasons why so many boomers didn't present with symptoms is because everyone used to smoke since nicotine can be used to self-medicate.
November 21, 2025 at 6:04 PM
So one of the interesting things that I'm going through right now is that my boomer mom is getting diagnosed with ADHD in her golden years. I wonder if one of the reasons why so many boomers didn't present with symptoms is because everyone used to smoke since nicotine can be used to self-medicate.
Creating a mascot for my philosophy of neorationalism, who's a rat in a leather trenchcoat with cool mirrorshades
November 21, 2025 at 5:47 PM
Creating a mascot for my philosophy of neorationalism, who's a rat in a leather trenchcoat with cool mirrorshades
I am not joking in the least yesterday evening I had the distinct pleasure of defining "gooning" to a council of asexuals
November 20, 2025 at 7:19 PM
I am not joking in the least yesterday evening I had the distinct pleasure of defining "gooning" to a council of asexuals
As a New Yorker who doesn't drive all motorsports like racing have zero appeal to me... but I would love competitive public transit. You drop contestants off somewhere in a city or county, tell them to get somewhere and they can only travel on foot or public transit. First one to arrive wins.
November 20, 2025 at 5:08 PM
As a New Yorker who doesn't drive all motorsports like racing have zero appeal to me... but I would love competitive public transit. You drop contestants off somewhere in a city or county, tell them to get somewhere and they can only travel on foot or public transit. First one to arrive wins.
Remember that every dollar Bruce Wayne puts into a giant bat-shaped plane or tight fitting leather fetish gear is a dollar that he could spent lobbying politicians for mental health or police reform
November 19, 2025 at 6:41 PM
Remember that every dollar Bruce Wayne puts into a giant bat-shaped plane or tight fitting leather fetish gear is a dollar that he could spent lobbying politicians for mental health or police reform
I endeavor to embody a form of asexuality that communicates "I am not to be fucked with" rather than "I do not fuck".
November 19, 2025 at 4:40 PM
I endeavor to embody a form of asexuality that communicates "I am not to be fucked with" rather than "I do not fuck".
More art criticism needs to be structured like Pete Wells' Guy Fieri review; just a series of pointed questions directed at the artist,
November 18, 2025 at 8:00 PM
More art criticism needs to be structured like Pete Wells' Guy Fieri review; just a series of pointed questions directed at the artist,
Does the existence of elf on a shelf imply the existence of dwarf in a hearth?
November 17, 2025 at 2:53 AM
Does the existence of elf on a shelf imply the existence of dwarf in a hearth?
Whenever I use a semicolon I always imagine myself as Columbo saying "Just one more thing" as I type
November 16, 2025 at 2:26 PM
Whenever I use a semicolon I always imagine myself as Columbo saying "Just one more thing" as I type
If anyone's wondering, yes, my recent obsession with 17th century Dutch history is why my beard looks this fuckin goofy
November 14, 2025 at 9:16 PM
If anyone's wondering, yes, my recent obsession with 17th century Dutch history is why my beard looks this fuckin goofy
It's difficult traveling the world as a New Yorker because you don't necessarily see foreign cultures you just think "oh so that's where that community in Queens came from, neat"
November 14, 2025 at 3:21 AM
It's difficult traveling the world as a New Yorker because you don't necessarily see foreign cultures you just think "oh so that's where that community in Queens came from, neat"
God I fucking love autumn. You can see the world dying, but it is not so unbearable that you need to hunker down and focus on survival. And you do know that after a period of struggle there will be an inevitable rebirth.
November 14, 2025 at 3:07 AM
God I fucking love autumn. You can see the world dying, but it is not so unbearable that you need to hunker down and focus on survival. And you do know that after a period of struggle there will be an inevitable rebirth.
Kinda wish they made velvet paintings of other musicians besides Elvis.
Imagine having a framed picture of Rivers Cuomo painted on sumptuous velvet hanging above your davenport.
Imagine having a framed picture of Rivers Cuomo painted on sumptuous velvet hanging above your davenport.
November 12, 2025 at 3:00 PM
Kinda wish they made velvet paintings of other musicians besides Elvis.
Imagine having a framed picture of Rivers Cuomo painted on sumptuous velvet hanging above your davenport.
Imagine having a framed picture of Rivers Cuomo painted on sumptuous velvet hanging above your davenport.
Is it reasonable that a chainmail bikini would be seen as lingerie in dwarven culture?
November 12, 2025 at 2:44 PM
Is it reasonable that a chainmail bikini would be seen as lingerie in dwarven culture?
Reposted by Maximilian Ximenez
My biggest takaway from Bugonia:
Jesse Plemons has a great head of hair on that noggin of his and needs to play Dave Mustaine in a biopic
Jesse Plemons has a great head of hair on that noggin of his and needs to play Dave Mustaine in a biopic
November 8, 2025 at 2:19 PM
My biggest takaway from Bugonia:
Jesse Plemons has a great head of hair on that noggin of his and needs to play Dave Mustaine in a biopic
Jesse Plemons has a great head of hair on that noggin of his and needs to play Dave Mustaine in a biopic
I am begging my fellow New Yorkers to reach back deep into our heritage and consistently refer to Hizzoner Mamdani as "The Boy-Mayor of New York"
November 5, 2025 at 6:36 PM
I am begging my fellow New Yorkers to reach back deep into our heritage and consistently refer to Hizzoner Mamdani as "The Boy-Mayor of New York"
Reposted by Maximilian Ximenez
Who we used to have to buy weed from before legalization
November 4, 2025 at 11:57 PM
Who we used to have to buy weed from before legalization
I apologize in advance to all the Stuyvesant alumni in whose faces I will rub a Mamdani victory.
It's ok, when your school produces a mayor you can get back to me.
It's ok, when your school produces a mayor you can get back to me.
November 4, 2025 at 11:52 PM
I apologize in advance to all the Stuyvesant alumni in whose faces I will rub a Mamdani victory.
It's ok, when your school produces a mayor you can get back to me.
It's ok, when your school produces a mayor you can get back to me.
... look the point being is I refuse to be governed by the laws of man inside the happiest place on earth, only Walt can judge me
November 4, 2025 at 7:16 PM
... look the point being is I refuse to be governed by the laws of man inside the happiest place on earth, only Walt can judge me