Alex Marino
@malex-aforethought.bsky.social
Writer (the Daily Show, Who is America), Digital artist (AMC), Singer (exclusively to my dog)
(any/all)
(any/all)
I count down the days to Heidi Klum’s unhinged Halloween costume reveal the way most people count the days down to Christmas.
October 29, 2025 at 10:41 PM
I count down the days to Heidi Klum’s unhinged Halloween costume reveal the way most people count the days down to Christmas.
Living in NYC is wild. People who will never come here have loud opinions about one of our mayoral candidates based on his opinion of a country they’d never even think about visiting.
October 26, 2025 at 4:57 AM
Living in NYC is wild. People who will never come here have loud opinions about one of our mayoral candidates based on his opinion of a country they’d never even think about visiting.
This is exactly what I said that got me banned from that Anne Rice fanfic forum.
September 30, 2025 at 9:57 PM
This is exactly what I said that got me banned from that Anne Rice fanfic forum.
How do all the “preserve history” people who clutched their pearls at the de-statue-ing of confederate generals feel about the Smithsonian removing Trump from the impeachment exhibit?
Y’all sad? You okay? I’m here if you need to talk.
Y’all sad? You okay? I’m here if you need to talk.
August 1, 2025 at 4:09 AM
How do all the “preserve history” people who clutched their pearls at the de-statue-ing of confederate generals feel about the Smithsonian removing Trump from the impeachment exhibit?
Y’all sad? You okay? I’m here if you need to talk.
Y’all sad? You okay? I’m here if you need to talk.
@stephenathomes.bsky.social should just rebrand as a right wing propagandist and basically shift to doing the Colbert Report 2025. Cutting satire but pretending to be a spineless shill who will do or say whatever it takes to make Trump happy.
July 30, 2025 at 1:51 AM
@stephenathomes.bsky.social should just rebrand as a right wing propagandist and basically shift to doing the Colbert Report 2025. Cutting satire but pretending to be a spineless shill who will do or say whatever it takes to make Trump happy.
Dr Demento is getting out of the game just before all the hackneyed “Bomb Iran” (to the tune of Barbra Anne) parodies flood his inbox AGAIN
June 22, 2025 at 3:52 AM
Dr Demento is getting out of the game just before all the hackneyed “Bomb Iran” (to the tune of Barbra Anne) parodies flood his inbox AGAIN
Sure we all hate when someone describes a dream to us, but have you ever had someone describe a baseball play to you?
June 12, 2025 at 4:44 AM
Sure we all hate when someone describes a dream to us, but have you ever had someone describe a baseball play to you?
That moment in Star Wars where Han Solo says “never tell me the odds” hits so much harder if you know he’s a gambling addict.
June 11, 2025 at 3:31 AM
That moment in Star Wars where Han Solo says “never tell me the odds” hits so much harder if you know he’s a gambling addict.
I think a lot of us probably would have joined a research expedition to the arctic by now if it hadn’t been for The Thing.
March 19, 2025 at 3:08 AM
I think a lot of us probably would have joined a research expedition to the arctic by now if it hadn’t been for The Thing.
Wait a goddamn second… in Spanish, “Mexico” is masculine, and “America” is feminine.
Those sons of birches made the Gulf trans!
Those sons of birches made the Gulf trans!
February 14, 2025 at 5:30 AM
Wait a goddamn second… in Spanish, “Mexico” is masculine, and “America” is feminine.
Those sons of birches made the Gulf trans!
Those sons of birches made the Gulf trans!
For a bunch of dipshits who pretend not to understand gender identity and gleefully deadname their own children, they sure are quick to embrace calling it the Gulf of America
February 11, 2025 at 1:55 AM
For a bunch of dipshits who pretend not to understand gender identity and gleefully deadname their own children, they sure are quick to embrace calling it the Gulf of America
I know there are more important things right now, and I’m coming to this late…
But are you telling me that Mare of Easttown and Mayor of Kingstown are completely different shows that have nothing to do with each other?
Unbelievable.
But are you telling me that Mare of Easttown and Mayor of Kingstown are completely different shows that have nothing to do with each other?
Unbelievable.
February 7, 2025 at 9:36 PM
I know there are more important things right now, and I’m coming to this late…
But are you telling me that Mare of Easttown and Mayor of Kingstown are completely different shows that have nothing to do with each other?
Unbelievable.
But are you telling me that Mare of Easttown and Mayor of Kingstown are completely different shows that have nothing to do with each other?
Unbelievable.
Guys. It’s 2025. Why can I STILL not text my dog?
January 2, 2025 at 6:30 AM
Guys. It’s 2025. Why can I STILL not text my dog?
Okay so we’ve gotten some important data recently: “Make America Great Again” has to be referring to a period in time AFTER the Panama Canal was built, but BEFORE the polio vaccine was introduced.
So somewhere between 1904 and 1955, which… I gotta tell you guys… does not look great.
So somewhere between 1904 and 1955, which… I gotta tell you guys… does not look great.
December 23, 2024 at 12:41 AM
Okay so we’ve gotten some important data recently: “Make America Great Again” has to be referring to a period in time AFTER the Panama Canal was built, but BEFORE the polio vaccine was introduced.
So somewhere between 1904 and 1955, which… I gotta tell you guys… does not look great.
So somewhere between 1904 and 1955, which… I gotta tell you guys… does not look great.
I wonder what Trump thinks a YMCA is.
December 1, 2024 at 5:35 AM
I wonder what Trump thinks a YMCA is.
Jeff Goldblum is Al Gore’s Waluigi.
I will not be taking questions at this time.
I will not be taking questions at this time.
November 21, 2024 at 2:58 PM
Jeff Goldblum is Al Gore’s Waluigi.
I will not be taking questions at this time.
I will not be taking questions at this time.
The bitter irony is how much Jay Leno now looks like a Conan character.
November 21, 2024 at 5:18 AM
The bitter irony is how much Jay Leno now looks like a Conan character.
I was in NYC carrying a huge, heavy bolt of fabric down 8th Ave. It started raining. A cab stoped about a block away to drop its fare. I sprinted at it. A man stepped out, held the door for me as I arrived, just as a woman came around the corner and ducked into the cab. It drove off…
Twitter is doing “best celebrity interactions” discourse so we should do WORST ones
not necessarily like that they were a jerk, just that the interaction itself was a fail on some level
like one time Robert Sean Leonard walked past me and I short-circuited so badly I spilled guacamole on myself
not necessarily like that they were a jerk, just that the interaction itself was a fail on some level
like one time Robert Sean Leonard walked past me and I short-circuited so badly I spilled guacamole on myself
November 19, 2024 at 7:28 AM
I was in NYC carrying a huge, heavy bolt of fabric down 8th Ave. It started raining. A cab stoped about a block away to drop its fare. I sprinted at it. A man stepped out, held the door for me as I arrived, just as a woman came around the corner and ducked into the cab. It drove off…
Hey @nytimes.com, this isn’t a circle.
Full circle would be:
Speaker allows ethics investigation > Gaetz ousts Speaker > Gaetz dodges release of ethics findings by leaving for DOJ > old Speaker now has job at DOJ running background checks on incoming staff.
That would be full circle 1/2
Full circle would be:
Speaker allows ethics investigation > Gaetz ousts Speaker > Gaetz dodges release of ethics findings by leaving for DOJ > old Speaker now has job at DOJ running background checks on incoming staff.
That would be full circle 1/2
November 17, 2024 at 8:44 PM
Hey @nytimes.com, this isn’t a circle.
Full circle would be:
Speaker allows ethics investigation > Gaetz ousts Speaker > Gaetz dodges release of ethics findings by leaving for DOJ > old Speaker now has job at DOJ running background checks on incoming staff.
That would be full circle 1/2
Full circle would be:
Speaker allows ethics investigation > Gaetz ousts Speaker > Gaetz dodges release of ethics findings by leaving for DOJ > old Speaker now has job at DOJ running background checks on incoming staff.
That would be full circle 1/2
Oh… I get it…
“Where at least *I* know *I’m* free…”
“Where at least *I* know *I’m* free…”
November 8, 2024 at 6:28 AM
Oh… I get it…
“Where at least *I* know *I’m* free…”
“Where at least *I* know *I’m* free…”
Hey @jeffbezos.bsky.social, I read that op-ed you published in that news paper you own. If any of it is true: you should fucking sell the paper or at absolute least never involve yourself in their editorial decisions. The fact that you won’t do either IS THE FUCKING PROBLEM.
October 29, 2024 at 1:31 AM
Hey @jeffbezos.bsky.social, I read that op-ed you published in that news paper you own. If any of it is true: you should fucking sell the paper or at absolute least never involve yourself in their editorial decisions. The fact that you won’t do either IS THE FUCKING PROBLEM.
The Trump camp getting huffy about being called fascists… After nearly a decade of Trump calling everyone he meets the most vile, childish, nasty, dangerous shit that he can conjure from the syphilis cratered valleys of is adderall saturated brain… what a bunch of whiney little bitches.
October 27, 2024 at 8:59 AM
The Trump camp getting huffy about being called fascists… After nearly a decade of Trump calling everyone he meets the most vile, childish, nasty, dangerous shit that he can conjure from the syphilis cratered valleys of is adderall saturated brain… what a bunch of whiney little bitches.
September 11, 2024 at 6:50 AM