Fable level stuff, I'd say, as those often come with a lesson: a lot of people—especially women, due to how they are often treated—are the cat. They want to see someone has the capacity for patience, respect, forethought, and kindness, ideally well *before* committing to an intimate relationship.

The world has probably heard a lot of these.

Yeah, I was actually kinda grumpy about that first one. We'd already been having an unlovely conversation about The Current Political Climate, and then I opened a cookie and it hit me like a Scroll of Truth.

These are honestly the three worst "fortunes" I've ever found in fortune cookies. I mean, yes, they're all thoughtful, decent advice, but that's not what I want from a fortune cookie. I want a sweet snack with a brief, vague, broadly-interpretable message about the future. A horoscope dessert.

At first glance, I thought that was a cookie in Santa Claus' hand. A cookie with a Baby Jesus on it that St. Nick was looking forward to eating.

Then it clicked that it was just a manger from the Nativity set on the table.

@otterkit.bsky.social , this makes me think of you, because it's probably your doing that I understand this reference!

My favorite local sock company asked this in a marketing email.

I submit that it is not cannibalism, but rather a fine and creative tradition like the much-vaunted Turducken. I am a definite fan of the Sock-in-Stockin'!

Lo, the season is nigh!

I low-key want to do this on purpose ...

I don't know if this ad was deliberately designed by a human, obliviously designed by a human who doesn't know the source material, or plagiarism machine–generated. Nor do I know which option is funnier, but I lol-ed. 🤣