Non-Smokey Bear
@linoleum.bsky.social
Shaming this dead hiker I found for violating leave no trace principles
November 23, 2025 at 6:50 PM
Shaming this dead hiker I found for violating leave no trace principles
ACAB includes guardian angels
November 2, 2025 at 2:31 AM
ACAB includes guardian angels
If Mark Wahlberg was at Kent State, it wouldn’t have went down like it did
August 22, 2025 at 3:03 AM
If Mark Wahlberg was at Kent State, it wouldn’t have went down like it did
“Peace lily? More like piece of shit lily.”
*dropkicks plant across funeral parlor*
*dropkicks plant across funeral parlor*
July 22, 2025 at 2:08 AM
“Peace lily? More like piece of shit lily.”
*dropkicks plant across funeral parlor*
*dropkicks plant across funeral parlor*
“My bulb is so wet right now”
- a doomer talking dirty
- a doomer talking dirty
June 27, 2025 at 12:01 AM
“My bulb is so wet right now”
- a doomer talking dirty
- a doomer talking dirty
Trying to find the best ufologist because I don’t want a botched vasectomy
May 30, 2025 at 6:11 PM
Trying to find the best ufologist because I don’t want a botched vasectomy
Support the toops, guys
May 23, 2025 at 3:47 AM
Support the toops, guys
I like my women like I like my Sig Sauer’s - liable to go off unexpectedly
May 21, 2025 at 3:04 AM
I like my women like I like my Sig Sauer’s - liable to go off unexpectedly
TED Talk joi change my life
May 18, 2025 at 11:36 PM
TED Talk joi change my life
ACAB includes ordering off menu
May 16, 2025 at 5:21 PM
ACAB includes ordering off menu
I like my women like I like my Keurig K cups - aggressively toxic
May 11, 2025 at 3:16 PM
I like my women like I like my Keurig K cups - aggressively toxic
ACAB includes the Staccato P
May 7, 2025 at 11:33 AM
ACAB includes the Staccato P
They call it the land of the free yet no one has developed a neck fan that doesn’t interfere with the cheek weld on my AR
May 4, 2025 at 11:38 AM
They call it the land of the free yet no one has developed a neck fan that doesn’t interfere with the cheek weld on my AR
Avoid the libertarian zoo. It’s just one emaciated lion and a bunch of sunbleached skeletons
May 3, 2025 at 2:54 PM
Avoid the libertarian zoo. It’s just one emaciated lion and a bunch of sunbleached skeletons
New product idea - gray mayonnaise aka Grayonnaise
May 1, 2025 at 12:08 AM
New product idea - gray mayonnaise aka Grayonnaise
This album is like twisted fantasy if Kanye realized that other people have feelings too
April 29, 2025 at 2:53 PM
This album is like twisted fantasy if Kanye realized that other people have feelings too
The grocery store can’t play Evanescence and expect me not to feel and express Big Emotions
April 21, 2025 at 9:22 PM
The grocery store can’t play Evanescence and expect me not to feel and express Big Emotions
How is it that the kids eat free promo at Hooters is never on my custody weekend?
April 20, 2025 at 11:58 PM
How is it that the kids eat free promo at Hooters is never on my custody weekend?
The version of Clue where every room is a goon cave and every weapon a cuck chair
April 20, 2025 at 2:19 PM
The version of Clue where every room is a goon cave and every weapon a cuck chair
Touch grass? Nay. Touch receipts until you have BPA coming out the wazoo
April 18, 2025 at 7:14 PM
Touch grass? Nay. Touch receipts until you have BPA coming out the wazoo
Did you all know that the 5 second rule is a myth (except for liquids)?
April 18, 2025 at 4:47 PM
Did you all know that the 5 second rule is a myth (except for liquids)?
Switching everyone to Windows 11 during Autism Acceptance Month is definitely a mixed message.
April 18, 2025 at 1:21 PM
Switching everyone to Windows 11 during Autism Acceptance Month is definitely a mixed message.