“We can disagree and still love each other unless your disagreement is rooted in my oppression and denial of my humanity and right to exist”

James Baldwin

Microdosing a heart attack by drinking 6 shots of espresso before noon.

Was there ever truly better times?

I’ve legitimately never felt more motivated in my life to lose weight and improve my strength and cardiovascular health than I do from the existential threat that fascism poses to our lives. Who knew evil was so motivating?

Has anyone else that’s spent years brainrotting on IG or FB felt as if their vocabulary is dwindling? I find it legitimately difficult to form proper sentences now and it requires a ton more brain power than it seemed to before the prevalence of reels and constant doomscrolling.

I’ve been reading “Tender is the Flesh” and in hindsight this week may have been a poor time to start this particular book. Feeling a touch too poignant.

People coming here from my instagram are probably like “oh… girl please be quiet” and I don’t blame you because same.

There’s a cosmic discontent swirling itself through my soul and binding to every tendril, snuffing out lights that once sparkled. Some weeks ago I might have identified this feeling as being akin to a rainstorm, but so quickly it’s become a typhoon of rage and compassion. I am, like many— adrift.

Everything feels different now. Like there’s this incessant burning in the pit of my stomach prodding me along, keeping me alive. I think a psychiatrist I had once called this feeling ‘spite’. I’d have sworn I could recall that feeling different, but in hindsight I wonder if maybe she was right.