he needs someone to remind him that he is a good father (nobody has said that to him yet) before he can go and get chris back

also he is seeing chris getting the childhood that he (eddie) probably always wanted (ramon is genuinely interested in chris). eddie needs to realise that he does deserve joy and isn't a danger to his son.

i think that he is fighting himself to not go and get chris because he thinks that chris is better/safer/happier in tx
i think that he just doesn't feel worthy right now and that probably thinks that he deserves to 'lose' chris over what happens.