Daily reminder that the cute girls at Jersey Mikes are only nice to you because they're paid to be nice to you
December 10, 2025 at 6:05 PM
Daily reminder that the cute girls at Jersey Mikes are only nice to you because they're paid to be nice to you
My favorite stripper got a boyfriend and quit and it's NOT ME!!!!!!
December 9, 2025 at 3:59 PM
My favorite stripper got a boyfriend and quit and it's NOT ME!!!!!!
I've gotten laid off the 👀 emoji more than any other strategy in history
December 5, 2025 at 1:01 AM
I've gotten laid off the 👀 emoji more than any other strategy in history
Now I'm getting ads for wedding rings what's that about
I've started to get dating app ads tailored to both men AND women parity achieved
November 25, 2025 at 5:35 PM
Now I'm getting ads for wedding rings what's that about
I've started to get dating app ads tailored to both men AND women parity achieved
November 20, 2025 at 8:56 PM
I've started to get dating app ads tailored to both men AND women parity achieved
You know they say you shouldn't stick your dick in crazy. But they're wrong.
November 2, 2025 at 6:25 PM
You know they say you shouldn't stick your dick in crazy. But they're wrong.
I'm giving my address to too many crazy chicks and that's on facts
October 30, 2025 at 4:12 PM
I'm giving my address to too many crazy chicks and that's on facts
If I could teleport my dick would never be dry
October 27, 2025 at 3:37 PM
If I could teleport my dick would never be dry
She asked me what my vibe was and I said "evil"
October 27, 2025 at 3:14 PM
She asked me what my vibe was and I said "evil"
Guy at the bar is bemoaning the fact his daughter left and had a wild streak and dropped all contact with him and moved to a city and I'm trying so hard not to ask him for her number
October 17, 2025 at 11:54 PM
Guy at the bar is bemoaning the fact his daughter left and had a wild streak and dropped all contact with him and moved to a city and I'm trying so hard not to ask him for her number
Getting lovebombed and believe me I'm taking that shit straight to the bank
October 17, 2025 at 1:47 PM
Getting lovebombed and believe me I'm taking that shit straight to the bank
It only takes like three inconveniences in a row to make me believe there is a worldwide conspiracy out to get me
October 13, 2025 at 10:41 PM
It only takes like three inconveniences in a row to make me believe there is a worldwide conspiracy out to get me
I need a girlboss so bad
October 11, 2025 at 12:38 PM
I need a girlboss so bad
I was visited by a spirit in my dream last night who told me to stop being a pervert
October 10, 2025 at 4:45 PM
I was visited by a spirit in my dream last night who told me to stop being a pervert
At the strip club bout to put Man Purposes, God Desposes by Sprain on the juke
October 9, 2025 at 12:52 AM
At the strip club bout to put Man Purposes, God Desposes by Sprain on the juke
I once hooked up with this lady and she had two copies of Tony Hawk Pro Skater Remastered for ps4 and she asked me if I wanted one of them and I was like "No no I couldn't...." what the fuck was wrong with me
October 5, 2025 at 3:05 PM
I once hooked up with this lady and she had two copies of Tony Hawk Pro Skater Remastered for ps4 and she asked me if I wanted one of them and I was like "No no I couldn't...." what the fuck was wrong with me
Lady posted two cute pics in a row and you know I smashed the Like button on those shits then the next pic was her and her bf I'm gonna be sick
September 21, 2025 at 2:49 PM
Lady posted two cute pics in a row and you know I smashed the Like button on those shits then the next pic was her and her bf I'm gonna be sick
First dates are awkward because you haven't fucked yet
September 5, 2025 at 9:44 PM
First dates are awkward because you haven't fucked yet
He proposed and she said yes 😔
September 5, 2025 at 3:40 PM
He proposed and she said yes 😔
Homie I met once at a summer camp 10 years ago has a super hot girlfriend now man anything is possible
September 4, 2025 at 11:36 PM
Homie I met once at a summer camp 10 years ago has a super hot girlfriend now man anything is possible
My pelvis is too big. If I wear my pants at the proper height on my waist my massive dong shows through
August 19, 2025 at 4:04 PM
My pelvis is too big. If I wear my pants at the proper height on my waist my massive dong shows through
The reason I'm single is because I post too nasty style on bluesky
August 18, 2025 at 9:01 PM
The reason I'm single is because I post too nasty style on bluesky
I'm realizing the real meaning of this desire is "I want a man who is 6'5 and jacked and rich and also has good grammar." Pick a lane baby!
Why do people on dating apps be like "I want a man with good grammar who knows the difference between You're and Your"
Raise the bar a little higher god damn. What about Farther vs Further. Lay, lie, and laid. Grow up.
Raise the bar a little higher god damn. What about Farther vs Further. Lay, lie, and laid. Grow up.
August 11, 2025 at 4:06 PM
I'm realizing the real meaning of this desire is "I want a man who is 6'5 and jacked and rich and also has good grammar." Pick a lane baby!
At my brother's bachelor party. The drunkest I've ever been. Half alive. The bartender flashed us and it was the worst pair of tits imaginable. That's about all I remember.
August 10, 2025 at 8:47 PM
At my brother's bachelor party. The drunkest I've ever been. Half alive. The bartender flashed us and it was the worst pair of tits imaginable. That's about all I remember.