My kind of town for yet another reason.

I worry about the in-person-prove-you’re-alive part. Even if you are mobile and can easily travel, how will that work? Get there, stand in a line, you hold up today’s newspaper so they can snap a pic of you?

Doesn’t his response sound a lot like the soliloquy from the witness stand when Colonel Jessep tried to dress down Lt. Kaffee in A Few Good Men just before he was arrested? He was spectacularly wrong too.

No, it’s a DUI hire.

Thank you, Mr. Cuban, for the hope.

Wow. I had no idea we were all this dumb. Not very data driven of me. I’ll do better.

Hold up. You used the words, “Donald Trump” and “apologize” in the same sentence. If you’re looking for an exemplar of mutual exclusivity in one, concise demonstration, that one right there is a pretty robust vintage.

I’m an Illinois alumni. WE beat Michigan during the regular season. You can only be so smug now having lost to the Illini then.

It’s the Citrus Bowl, with a heavy lean-in from (sponsored by) Cheez-its in the Camping World Stadium, formerly known by three other names.

That sounds like a great job, one apparently perfect for you, and one you likely enjoy a lot.

Are we sure they knew this going into today’s game? It seems they might not have the same set of rules the other teams do.