Those were the positive discussions. The ones where people decided if we were still fuckable. I was pretty convinced for years that no one could ever be attracted to me as a man because of them. It was a thing I had to mentally accept before embracing my identity

The only thing that’s ever made me feel a little regret for not doing the kid thing is the guilt of knowing my mom wanted grandkids. I think the closest thing I can equivocate it to is the feeling I get around animals?

god damnit.

I was telling them why I’ve decided to wait, and could see a flash of panic there. Because it’s dangerous to be openly who I am now. In a sense it’s comforting to know I’m not overreacting by being afraid, but more than that. It fucking sucks.

Which brings me to we need BETTER sex scenes. “WOW! They’re FUCKING” should not be all I take away from a sex scene in a story that’s not made for the purpose of being porn. Unsensationalize it and it becomes a more diverse, more *useful* narrative tool

Sometimes a cut to black *is* all you need from a sex scene in a broader narrative. Nothing unexpected is happening there. Sometimes a more explicit scene is necessary to give us interiority of one or more of the characters

Cool character shit can happen in sex scenes. Sad, joyful, terrifying, important shit can happen there. It should be just another tool in an artist’s arsenal

Also it’ll help people have normal takes around sex scenes bc good lord

This can’t be what passes for queer media

Hate it here

It’s also that fallen order had such a strong narrative and concept that I had pretty high standards for survivor tbh

Cal as a conservationist/historian is far more interesting to me than Cal as yet another Jedi warrior battling against internal corruption because he got real sad and angry (an oversimplification, but you get the point)

And in that regard, it’s a rehash of most other Jedi stories. We’ve seen that narrative, and they’re not doing anything really new with it

I can’t put my finger on why survivor falls flat to me, but maybe this is an element of it? It’s not really saying anything new about the Jedi or the broader universe. It’s become a much more insular story about Cal in Survivor, his personal connections, what about corruption tempts him