so glad to have gotten this last year :D

its the paranoia

but like... the idea of being apart of your feed or tbh just having access to my account.. its like having a stranger in my brain, as a guest but i Really want to kill you when i remember youre there

still gonna keep comms open though cause i have no money and no job

its my only comfort and the cords that whip

and after feel like what little connection i did attempt fell flat
just, sucks

i hate sounding like this, but i always get so hard on myself when i see others able to get along/socialize; not to say that they may find it easy, but that i cant even push myself for the bare minimum

but there are some i want to complete with a physical medium

no to say that i received inadequate care, but that they could do little more than offer stabilization and medication; as someone with cptsd, trauma informed therapy is the only effective first step for long term recovery for me