Saucepans have long been my culinary Achilles’ heel, but even they were no match for @sambaschutte.bsky.social’s teaching skills! Managed to get through not one, but TWO saucepan components without anything burning, separating, or performing any other inexplicable feats of chemistry. Huzzah!

🎶 The Internet is for porn! The Internet is for porn! 🎶

I won’t lie - this has not quite yielded the financial return that I was promised (I suspect that Prince Azi fellow may not have been on the level), but it sure does bring me joy every time I see it on my fridge. 🥰 #OFMDCraftFair

My friend just sent me this, and if this isn’t peak Buttons energy, I don’t know what is.

9yo Mini Minion was PISSED that I made @sambaschutte.bsky.social ‘s key lime pie for a work thing and did not save him a slice. So, he insisted on making his very own this weekend. He noped out of mixing and got a bit heavy-handed with the whipped cream, but I declare his first effort a success*! 🤩

NYT this is Gentlebeard erasure. 😡

Yeah, I wanna play this time.

My Buttons/Karl necklace seems to have actually put a hex upon me, which is simultaneously the saddest and most fitting thing that has happened to me recently. 😂 😩

Algorithm, just what in the actual FUCK did I do to make you think I would EVER be caught DEAD in this shirt??? I can’t believe this shit is real. Looks like something from an SNL parody. 😭

How my husband asks for the grocery list. 😂

HE’S HEEEEEEEERE!!! 😍😍😍
I love him so much and he is so precious to me. Thank you so, so much for your beautiful work, @magpieinpjpants.bsky.social !! Rest assured that our boys are reunited and basking in MerSmooches.

For the past few weeks, my 5yo has been working on a “super secret surprise” whenever she visits her grandparents. Today, she finally showed me what she’s been working on: “a blanket for MerStede!” 🥹🥹🥹
I think he looks cozy. 🥰
MerStede courtesy of @magpieinpjpants.bsky.social

Well, we had a slight delay due to a malfunctioning springform pan, but I was finally able to get the whipped cream on top and dig in! It was a big hit at our Mother’s Day gathering. Thanks so much for the lesson, @sambaschutte.bsky.social ! I feel so accomplished.

Not sure I looked quite menacing enough to pass for a proper pirate, but SHUT UP I DID PIRATE BAKING WITH @sambaschutte.bsky.social !!!! Had the best time. 😁

HE’S HEEEEEEEEREEEEE!!!! 🥰🥰🥰
I love him SO. FREAKIN’. MUCH. I love him so much that I would even share my 1/2 pyramid with him. I would die for my adorable little crocheted MerStede. Thanks so much to @magpieinpjpants.bsky.social and all the amazing people involved in the #OFMDCraftFair !!!!!

I may be a bit late to the party, but I, for one, am glad that Prince Azi gave this decision the time and consideration that it deserves. I am delighted to find that I have been selected as ze one and only owner of ze half pyramid! Shame I can’t tell anybody, though. Must remain discrete.

OM NOM NOM. Said exactly this on tumblr earlier this year! 😂

For a brief and beautiful moment, I was 100% certain that this car sticker depicted our very own Edward Teach. Thank you, #OFMD fan artists, for continually putting our boy in little outfits and slutty situations. You have broken something in my perception that I never want fixed. 💜