John Yabes
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johnyabes.bsky.social
John Yabes
@johnyabes.bsky.social
Check out my special "Thanks, Diabetes!" On YouTube!
like many ppl in LA I'm disappointed not being where I thought I'd be by now... and that's mostly dead at the bottom of a ravine.
September 13, 2025 at 10:03 AM
if I could go back in time I'd fucking eat so many steaks as a kid. fuck those chicken nuggets and juice boxes. just steaks, truffle brownies, and milkshakes.
September 12, 2025 at 8:55 AM
the most generous casting in Hollywood is Lorraine and Ed Warren
August 25, 2025 at 1:11 AM
I think I've done everything I ever wanted to do 🙉
August 22, 2025 at 6:05 AM
I miss vine
August 20, 2025 at 6:29 AM
what if instead of Tony Stark telling everyone he was Iron Man at the end of Iron Man, he just let out a long, loud, smelly, wet fart.
July 28, 2025 at 9:01 PM
release the hogan files.
July 27, 2025 at 3:46 PM
Stranger Things 5: they're all 30 now.
July 22, 2025 at 5:13 AM
The first person to die: Hey, what the hell... ?
July 20, 2025 at 8:36 AM
SPOILERS:

Superman stops Lex Luthor by introducing him to an Asian woman.
July 20, 2025 at 6:34 AM
all my journals eventually turn into suicide notes that are dated
July 18, 2025 at 10:18 AM
can you imagine if superman did coke?
July 16, 2025 at 7:33 PM
@jamesgunn.bsky.social
Katy O'Brian should be wonder woman.

and me? well make me condiment king 😀
July 16, 2025 at 5:44 PM
an act of kindness is to not kill yourself on someone you love's birthday.
July 16, 2025 at 5:46 AM
I eye fuck the shit out of myself in the mirror.
June 26, 2025 at 10:33 PM
there should be a special program for people who wanna stay single, childless, and just wanna keep up with the MCU that will just let them live in a studio for free until they're dead.
June 24, 2025 at 8:22 AM
that physical exhaustion osmosis when listening to someone talking about picking up a second and third shift at work.
June 24, 2025 at 8:19 AM
The sigh you make when you wake from shit sleep as you squint through tired eyes and wonder how your hair got so messy and dry like a tumbleweed
June 24, 2025 at 8:17 AM
the best thing about the post apocalypse? no bills to pay! the worst? deciding who to eat for dinner.
June 22, 2025 at 10:56 PM
I'm either at 1. hey things ain't too bad or 2. I'd like to be dead now.
June 22, 2025 at 10:55 PM
what's my advice for new comics? call 911!
June 21, 2025 at 11:09 PM
I had a dream where Tim Robinson was the Penguin and now that's all I'm thinking about.
June 15, 2025 at 8:26 PM
the regret from some of the right isn't about empathy, most of it is because of their loss of workforce - which means their bottom lines - so fuck them.
June 14, 2025 at 12:46 AM
Me, reading about the Male Loneliness Epidemic: "The hell are they talking about? hahaha," Yabes lauded, echoing into the big empty space that was his apartment.
June 14, 2025 at 12:30 AM
June 11, 2025 at 5:25 AM