Johnny
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johnnyonelung.bsky.social
Johnny
@johnnyonelung.bsky.social
"sleeping on a hard floor is really good for you"

it's painful pain and I can't sleep?

"oh just stick with it for a couple of years and it gets really good"

aye, dickhead. bet you watch one piece.
December 6, 2024 at 8:07 AM
"this is gonna be my year!"
me:
December 5, 2024 at 4:54 AM
hoping a Joe Roganski character is in GTA VI and they go for that turncoats throat
December 2, 2024 at 2:01 PM
two historical figures I know in my heart were 10/10 hotties:

1. Helen of Troy
2. Freud's mum
November 28, 2024 at 7:19 AM
bracing for Spotify's inevitable annual snitching on my depression
November 24, 2024 at 3:11 PM
in my 10+ years of using #adobe software I just saved my work 30 seconds before a crash

#editors
November 23, 2024 at 2:20 AM
This is the poster from yesterday's China vs Japan match that China used.

10/10. No notes.
November 20, 2024 at 2:28 AM
new (shitty) strat "clever" creators do on Tiktok:

1) buy medium sized account
2) rebrand to "fan account" or generic "streamerclipz"
3) upload clips from your main over & over again
4) repeat

"haha guess I just have lots of fan accounts" - you're not slick, not everyone's as stupid as your fans.
November 19, 2024 at 10:34 PM
Every time I see clips of Son Heung-Min I have to fight not to develop warm feelings towards @spursofficial.bsky.social

It's a 1:1 of when militaries use beautiful women in recruitment ads targeted at me.
November 19, 2024 at 11:21 AM
Reposted by Johnny
🦆💦💦💦
November 18, 2024 at 4:03 AM
Rules for every "UK Tour" announcement:

12 nights in South England.
2 in North England
1 for either Glasgow or Swansea.
Never leave Britain.
November 17, 2024 at 5:41 PM
stop clickbaiting me with frozen bacteria.

until I can fuck or fight an alien, it's not an alien.
November 17, 2024 at 12:13 PM
⚠️ Fix your Spotify Shuffle ⚠️

This is the setting that makes Spotify's shuffle so ass (it's on by default) #music #spotify #whatmorondecidedthis
November 16, 2024 at 9:35 AM
"And we shall hold the election on the same month that we'll insist on meeting our relatives!"

"Before? So we can talk with our families?"

"Oh no no no, we'll do it riiiight after it's to late to do anything about it"
November 15, 2024 at 8:17 AM