Why don’t they just make a tree that grows medicine

25 y.o. Me 🤝 8 y.o. Me 🤝 performing rituals with my friends for gods we made up

I would watch sports if the outfits were cute and if all the team colors were pink and if everyone passionately kissed the opposing team afterwards

I love discovering things in therapy that are completely groundbreaking revelations that change the course of my life only to find out they are just Basic Life Skills

Some highlights from the “New Jersey Mystery Drones - let’s solve it.” Facebook group:

Fellas is it gay

Gonna start replacing “bro” with “diva.” Finance bro? No. Ur a finance diva now. Tech bro? Tech diva. Get with it or get lost

Yo but video games tho

Personally, my villain arc began the first time I attended someone else’s thanksgiving dinner where everyone was forced to weigh themselves at the beginning and end of the night to see how much we ate