Joe Lancaster — on parental leave until January 2026
@joelancaster.com
Assistant editor @reason.com | John Brown stan, power pop enthusiast
I think it’s Normal and Good that the government of the most powerful nation on earth is run and entirely staffed by the bullies from a Stephen King novel
November 16, 2025 at 7:54 PM
I think it’s Normal and Good that the government of the most powerful nation on earth is run and entirely staffed by the bullies from a Stephen King novel
Y’know, there are just some sentences and phrases you really never expect to find yourself writing.
October 30, 2025 at 5:39 PM
Y’know, there are just some sentences and phrases you really never expect to find yourself writing.
September 30, 2025 at 9:42 PM
My wife took this picture of me with our dog a couple years while we were supposed to be doing a family photo shoot, and I told her she had just made me a member of the Intellectual Dark Web. She didn’t get the joke, and I envied her for it
September 16, 2025 at 6:04 AM
My wife took this picture of me with our dog a couple years while we were supposed to be doing a family photo shoot, and I told her she had just made me a member of the Intellectual Dark Web. She didn’t get the joke, and I envied her for it
“to our minds, among the biggest culprits are the universities”
September 13, 2025 at 3:33 AM
“to our minds, among the biggest culprits are the universities”
Haven’t seen Fantastic Four yet but I hope they include this scene from the original comic, where Ben feels he’s no longer a man and has been reduced to nothing more than an object, only for Reed to cut in, “Yeah sure thing—and you can call ME Mr Hot Shit!”
July 30, 2025 at 7:49 PM
Haven’t seen Fantastic Four yet but I hope they include this scene from the original comic, where Ben feels he’s no longer a man and has been reduced to nothing more than an object, only for Reed to cut in, “Yeah sure thing—and you can call ME Mr Hot Shit!”
One setback and one spinal surgery later, this little guy has a long road to recovery but a solid prognosis otherwise
July 12, 2025 at 6:27 PM
One setback and one spinal surgery later, this little guy has a long road to recovery but a solid prognosis otherwise
Gotta say, I didn’t know famously yip-afflicted MLB pitcher Chuck Knoblauch’s Wikipedia page has *multiple* suboptimal section headings
July 8, 2025 at 4:13 PM
Gotta say, I didn’t know famously yip-afflicted MLB pitcher Chuck Knoblauch’s Wikipedia page has *multiple* suboptimal section headings
I’ll always remember him as ski instructor Blaine from Hot Tub Time Machine
July 2, 2025 at 5:48 AM
I’ll always remember him as ski instructor Blaine from Hot Tub Time Machine
“When it’s time for a cold drink on a hot day, the last thing you need is to wonder if the water or the ice is clean. That’s why I only trust *glances quickly* Ex-Wife brand refrigerator filters.”
June 16, 2025 at 4:55 PM
“When it’s time for a cold drink on a hot day, the last thing you need is to wonder if the water or the ice is clean. That’s why I only trust *glances quickly* Ex-Wife brand refrigerator filters.”
When Scott Weiland died, megaphone stocks plummeted
June 4, 2025 at 9:12 PM
When Scott Weiland died, megaphone stocks plummeted
One month later. He’s not out of the woods but he’s MUCH better. Another month at this rate and he should be just about back to normal. We bought him this stroller for the time being but I think we’ll keep it in the rotation, he really seems to love being comfortable and closer to the action 🥰
May 29, 2025 at 5:40 PM
One month later. He’s not out of the woods but he’s MUCH better. Another month at this rate and he should be just about back to normal. We bought him this stroller for the time being but I think we’ll keep it in the rotation, he really seems to love being comfortable and closer to the action 🥰
To be honest I could've filled the word count just with my favorite @theonion.com headlines (and in fact I included several). Here's one portion I ended up cutting for space
![The paper even turned some politicians into recurring characters: During Obama’s presidency, The Onion wrote of then-Vice President Joe Biden as a womanizing, blue-collar party animal, who listened to hair metal and drove a Pontiac Trans Am. Younger readers who only know Biden as the doddering, elderly president would likely be confused by the Election Day 2012 Onion headline “Poll Workers Overhear Biden Repeating Phrase ‘Banged Her’ While Reading Names On Ballot.” Onion articles in the 1990s had then-President Bill Clinton writing a fan letter to 80s punk rocker Joan Jett and, after the deaths of several staffers and administration officials, “pour[ing] a 40-ounce bottle of King Cobra malt liquor on the ground in honor of his dead homies.”](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:gmrkjigyttfrwbrdxszry5at/bafkreiau2u5s4fvml3azg7vhf2radfikuynohzourx3ykkzodznsmcuape@jpeg)
May 19, 2025 at 6:27 PM
To be honest I could've filled the word count just with my favorite @theonion.com headlines (and in fact I included several). Here's one portion I ended up cutting for space
Just occurred to me: the entire MAGA movement’s messaging campaign is like a particularly lazy Judah Friedlander bit
May 4, 2025 at 1:51 AM
Just occurred to me: the entire MAGA movement’s messaging campaign is like a particularly lazy Judah Friedlander bit
This is Fox. Over the past 48 hours he started having trouble with his back, until today he couldn’t even stand on his hind legs. He’s not even that old, maybe 8 or 9? Anyway. He’s my special little guy and I don’t know what I’ll do if he doesn’t get better.
April 23, 2025 at 2:04 AM
This is Fox. Over the past 48 hours he started having trouble with his back, until today he couldn’t even stand on his hind legs. He’s not even that old, maybe 8 or 9? Anyway. He’s my special little guy and I don’t know what I’ll do if he doesn’t get better.
lmao I get it now, Candace Owens is the most gullible person alive
February 27, 2025 at 5:10 PM
lmao I get it now, Candace Owens is the most gullible person alive
I know it seems boring, and there’s plenty of other shit competing for your eyeballs, but it’s worth paying attention to what’s going on at the FCC.
February 5, 2025 at 9:45 PM
I know it seems boring, and there’s plenty of other shit competing for your eyeballs, but it’s worth paying attention to what’s going on at the FCC.
Fuck. RIP to a (sur)real one.
January 16, 2025 at 7:13 PM
Fuck. RIP to a (sur)real one.
Cinematography, production design, direction?? It should’ve walked away with those awards. [GOB Bluth voice] COME on!!!
January 12, 2025 at 5:18 PM
Cinematography, production design, direction?? It should’ve walked away with those awards. [GOB Bluth voice] COME on!!!