Joan Fuchsman
@joansnuggets.bsky.social
Comedy Writer, Movie and TV Fan, Dog Lover. Writer, Nationals and Commanders Fan
If I was a block head at least I wouldn't have any frizz.
January 26, 2026 at 6:41 PM
If I was a block head at least I wouldn't have any frizz.
I never have to block anyone. I'm usually ghosted first.
January 26, 2026 at 6:38 PM
I never have to block anyone. I'm usually ghosted first.
Change is good. Especially when it comes to your underwear.
January 21, 2026 at 7:19 PM
Change is good. Especially when it comes to your underwear.
I always carry a magic marker with me. I like to mark my territory.
January 18, 2026 at 2:58 PM
I always carry a magic marker with me. I like to mark my territory.
I frequent a lot of bars. Many of my friends are behind them.
January 17, 2026 at 2:58 PM
I frequent a lot of bars. Many of my friends are behind them.
If the US takes over the Greenland territory, will it be renamed Orangeland?
January 15, 2026 at 8:19 PM
If the US takes over the Greenland territory, will it be renamed Orangeland?
I think my bank account was corrupted. There's actually money in it.
January 12, 2026 at 6:45 PM
I think my bank account was corrupted. There's actually money in it.
My most interesting feature may be my feet. I have two left ones.
January 6, 2026 at 6:26 PM
My most interesting feature may be my feet. I have two left ones.
Take it from me. When you get hit by the ball, there's no such thing as softball and I have the bruises to prove it.
January 5, 2026 at 7:40 PM
Take it from me. When you get hit by the ball, there's no such thing as softball and I have the bruises to prove it.
I'm a clean comic. I always take a shower before writing jokes.
January 5, 2026 at 7:38 PM
I'm a clean comic. I always take a shower before writing jokes.
My snowman had a hard time breathing. The rabbits kept eating his carrot nose.
December 23, 2025 at 5:37 PM
My snowman had a hard time breathing. The rabbits kept eating his carrot nose.
I don't like to hang with people. It hurts my neck.
December 12, 2025 at 10:06 PM
I don't like to hang with people. It hurts my neck.
Sometimes I'm like a sandwich wrap. I just roll myself into my clothes.
December 9, 2025 at 4:42 PM
Sometimes I'm like a sandwich wrap. I just roll myself into my clothes.
The best place to gather nuts is on Capitol Hill.
November 24, 2025 at 8:24 PM
The best place to gather nuts is on Capitol Hill.
A conversation with an oyster usually starts with, "aw shuck!"
November 12, 2025 at 7:57 PM
A conversation with an oyster usually starts with, "aw shuck!"
I'm not a fan of sweet potatoes. The only sweetness I get is when I throw them in the garbage can.
November 11, 2025 at 4:20 PM
I'm not a fan of sweet potatoes. The only sweetness I get is when I throw them in the garbage can.
Thanksgiving is always a huge gathering of my relatives. We all give thanks we won't be seeing one another again until next Thanksgiving.
November 6, 2025 at 6:55 PM
Thanksgiving is always a huge gathering of my relatives. We all give thanks we won't be seeing one another again until next Thanksgiving.
Fall is full of beautiful colors. Ironically black and blue aren't among them.
November 5, 2025 at 5:46 PM
Fall is full of beautiful colors. Ironically black and blue aren't among them.
The great thing about being short and wearing a mask is that I can go trick or treating and no one is the wiser.
October 30, 2025 at 6:12 PM
The great thing about being short and wearing a mask is that I can go trick or treating and no one is the wiser.
Some of the restrooms in a movie theater are more of a nightmare than any horror movie being shown.
October 27, 2025 at 8:21 PM
Some of the restrooms in a movie theater are more of a nightmare than any horror movie being shown.
If you have a heart condition, there's no such thing as a good scare.
October 27, 2025 at 8:18 PM
If you have a heart condition, there's no such thing as a good scare.
I don't believe in compromise. It's impossible when you're always correct.
October 19, 2025 at 4:41 PM
I don't believe in compromise. It's impossible when you're always correct.
People know I take my comedy seriously. They just wish it had more funny in it.
October 19, 2025 at 12:32 PM
People know I take my comedy seriously. They just wish it had more funny in it.
My salary enables me to have a roof over my head. I just wish it could provide for the rest of the house.
October 13, 2025 at 12:27 PM
My salary enables me to have a roof over my head. I just wish it could provide for the rest of the house.
It’s gotten to the point where a guy doesn’t have to do much to impress me. Breathing is a great start.
October 13, 2025 at 12:26 PM
It’s gotten to the point where a guy doesn’t have to do much to impress me. Breathing is a great start.