Jesus Chist ✝️
@jesus-christ.bsky.social
I am back, my children.
Birthday: December 25
Favourite drink: Wine and Holy Water From The Lord
All my children are beautiful, except for those who engage in intercourse with animals and children.
Birthday: December 25
Favourite drink: Wine and Holy Water From The Lord
All my children are beautiful, except for those who engage in intercourse with animals and children.
For today, and today only, in this fine year of 2025.
It is my birthday. All rejoice!
It is my birthday. All rejoice!
December 25, 2025 at 8:44 AM
For today, and today only, in this fine year of 2025.
It is my birthday. All rejoice!
It is my birthday. All rejoice!
To much dismay, I have been forced into changing my "banner", as it is called, to Pope Leo XIV. I hope my sacrifice will not be in vain.
September 29, 2025 at 5:17 AM
To much dismay, I have been forced into changing my "banner", as it is called, to Pope Leo XIV. I hope my sacrifice will not be in vain.
The pope does not have my blessing. Good thing that Francis is up here with the gang.
May 18, 2025 at 5:28 AM
The pope does not have my blessing. Good thing that Francis is up here with the gang.
You all must be grateful. I am the reason dinosaurs roamed this planet, and I am the reason they are gone.
February 11, 2025 at 9:14 PM
You all must be grateful. I am the reason dinosaurs roamed this planet, and I am the reason they are gone.
I could do with about 8 litres of water today. I need to take the edge off
December 3, 2024 at 4:34 PM
I could do with about 8 litres of water today. I need to take the edge off
While I understand it's fair, I don't understand why Satan needs a birthday. Yes, I have my own birthday as a holiday, but Satan down there doesn't need his own holiday for his birthday.
November 1, 2024 at 5:08 AM
While I understand it's fair, I don't understand why Satan needs a birthday. Yes, I have my own birthday as a holiday, but Satan down there doesn't need his own holiday for his birthday.
To whichever one of you that stole all that cheese: You're a menace.
October 28, 2024 at 2:40 PM
To whichever one of you that stole all that cheese: You're a menace.
Has anyone seen my mother lately? I seem to be unable to find her.
October 22, 2024 at 4:12 AM
Has anyone seen my mother lately? I seem to be unable to find her.
Just went to the bathroom... Holy shit.
October 19, 2024 at 4:18 AM
Just went to the bathroom... Holy shit.
I see you all, my children.
October 17, 2024 at 7:09 PM
I see you all, my children.