It’s been a while since we’ve heard from Temu Goebbels. And when toddlers get quiet, they’re usually setting something on fire.

Y’all laughed when I put all my money into cats.

Finding my fingertip in your pad kee mao is like finding the baby in a king cake. Enjoy your year of prosperity!

fog machine: check

maybe don’t buy us any books for awhile

Me: decluttering is good for the mind and soul.
Also me: the cats need a bed shaped like Baby Yoda.

Standing in the corner with my glass of wine, pretending to understand art.