I don't like Christmas music before Thanksgiving. It upsets me

I can't laugh right now because I kind of have to pee right now and when you're 42 that means you might pee

I'd rather have the relaxing feeling of going to the bathroom whenever I need to than have trashcans

That's what the crazy bitches do. They trap in the submissives

I forgot to mention to our financial advisor that if we're having a child it will be through a surrogate